Some bachelors are just not cut out for the final rose — but they still make for great TV. Let's meet five whackadoos who probably should've just watched The Bachelorette from home like the rest of us.
5. The Fainter: David Vargas, Season 3
David will go down in TV history as the first bachelor to get the vapors during a Rose Ceremony. The 35-year-old from Chicago fainted on Jen Schefft's first night as the Bachelorette. Not a good sign. During the After the Final Rose show, Chris Harrison asked David what happened. David claimed he'd been working out, and that he'd cut the carbs in his diet, so he got lightheaded. "Not the way you wanted attention on national television," Chris joked. David replied, "Somebody had to take the fall, right?" The sense of humor is a plus, but the fact that he was so body-centric he made himself pass out from deprivation? Not hot. A girl needs a guy with stamina.
4. The Egomaniac: Greg Bilbro, Season 5
The top four guys are all from Jillian Harris's season — lucky girl! — which was so brimming with crazy antics that Bilbro only made #4. Of course, Bilbro would never consider himself a 4. "On a scale of 0 to Bilbro, how hot am I? I'm Bilbro! Perfect 10!" He also asked Jill to "hug it out" when they first met and even tried some (bad) break-dancing to win her heart. Bilbro would've ranked higher on the list had Jill kept him longer than one night. Good move for her, bad move for viewers wanting more comic relief.
3. The Foot Fetish: Tanner Pope, Season 5
The thing that was most ridiculous about Tanner's foot fetish was how little Jillian minded it. Most girls would be creeped out by the extent of the toe lust he gushed to the cameras, but Jill seemed to laugh it off. Financial analyst Tanner, 30, revealed that once he felt how soft Jillian's feet were, he was ready to take her home to his family. He also said her feet would be a 10 if she would paint L'Oreal's "Mango Mango" nail polish (now called "Mango-Get-Em") on them. So — enabler alert! — Jillian wore "Mango Mango" nail polish to the Men Tell All special and told Tanner it was for him. Tease much? Creepy.
2. The Aggressive Guy: David Good, Season 5
Dave is the drunken frat boy your mom hopes you never meet and sure as hell don't marry. His obsession with "man code" was bad enough. After repeatedly lambasting poor Juan Barbieri for not wanting to get drunk on shots during the show — thereby violating "man code" — trucking contractor Dave, 27, made an aggressive, disrespectful pass at Jillian, who was clearly not in the mood to kiss him. For once, Jill made the "good" call and sent the bad boy home.
1. The Crazy Country Singer: Wes Hayden, Season 5
You know what, it doesn't even matter if Wes had a girlfriend while on the show. It doesn't even matter if he went on the show just to promote his bad music. Just Wes on his own was ridiculous enough. The rooster hair. The cowboy clothes. The goofy I-look-high-even-when-I'm-probably-not expressions. The fact that he repeatedly mentioned being a big deal down in Chihuahua, Mexico, while playing the same dang song — "Love don't come eeee-zay..." — over and over and over and over again. He was a walking lounge lizard. Jillian desperately tried to ignore the allegations — thanks, Jake Pavelka! — that Wes had a girlfriend, but she couldn't ignore the fact that he was just flat-out weird. Remember when they had that picnic lunch outside in Spain and Jillian was frustrated with Wes's lack of affection? When she tried to get some solid answers from him on where they would live and what he would do for a job if she picked him in the end, Wes replied by looking away from Jillian and announcing, "That bird has no foot." Uh, yeah, totally random. Everything about Wes was just so freaking odd. He made for one helluva season, though. And he's right — love don't come eeee-zay.