Dmitry didn’t even get to enjoy a quality shirtless moment like Maks (whose “Sex on a Stick” story proved he’s absolutely as “cocky” as they say). Powers That Be, please bring Dmitry back for several Results Shows this season. He’s a good egg.
Even though it was pretty inevitable that Petra would go home, we were still hoping for an upset. Petra, Ralph Macchio and Kendra Wilkinson were tied with the lowest judges’ scores. We knew Ralph would be fine, since he’s a nice guy, very popular, and usually on or close to the top. But Kendra’s comments made us think she doesn’t even want to be on the show, and her dancing isn’t on the same level as lovable Petra’s. However, Kendra’s million-plus Twitter followers came in handy. Again. Alas.
Read on for a full recap of the Week 5 Results Show:
Encore dance:Len Goodman said Romeo & Chelsie Hightower were the judges’ choice for the encore dance. Their “New York, New York” Foxtrot really is classy and elegant. Yeah, Kendra, we dropped the e-bomb. Deal.
Brooke’s look: The sparkling gold dress is nice and looks like another one of her beloved Herve Legers. The hair, though. Are we OK with those curls? She looks better with the sleek hair, no?
Toby Keith performs: He started with “Should’ve Been a Cowboy,” accompanied by DWTS pros Lacey Schwimmer (we miss you!) and Maksim Chmerkovskiy (we love you, even when you’re “cocky”!) and the new DWTS pro Dance Troupe (hi!). Speaking of Maks and cowboys, check out the hot pic of Maks that Chelsea Kane tweeted. Later, Toby sang “American Soldier,” accompanied by DWTS pros — and married couple — Anna Trebunskaya and Jonathan Roberts. We haven’t seen Jonathan in a while. What gives? There were soldiers in the audience and Tom Bergeron said Toby was leaving for the Middle East tonight for his ninth USO tour.
Next week: It was revealed that DWTS Week 6 is Guilty Pleasures Week. What does that even mean? Are these themes getting out of control?
Mike Catherwood plays whistleblower: The first guy dumped from Season 12 is now exposing the show! He caught Hines Ward farting at Kym Johnson and Chelsie Hightower’s falsie falling out during rehearsals. He even caught Maks denying he’s “cocky,” then striking a “cocky” pose and announcing he’s not blind, he can look in the mirror and see that he’s sexy. Here’s how he became “Sex on a Stick”: “I’m a stick that’s been dipped into, like, a boiling pot of sex and they took me out...” We didn’t quite catch the end because we were busy retching.
"Macy’s Stars of Dance" performance: The studio was transformed into New York for the story of a small-town boy heading to the Big Apple in pursuit of the American dream. Jamal Sims (“Footloose,” “Rock of Ages”) choreographed and starred in the number set to Janelle Monae’s “Tightrope.” Impressive stuff! Love the song, too.
Judges handicap the contestants: Since we’re past halfway at this point, the judges are going to watch for all the flaws. They say Kendra needs confidence in herself. Petra has beautiful lines but she has trouble transitioning from pose to pose. Hines needs to take more risks to show that he’s pushing himself to the limit. Chris is a great performer, but what he lacks is musicality. Chelsea has been the biggest risk-taker, but she needs to blend traditional and modern. Ralph can convince the audience that he’s good but the judges can see past that to what he’s doing wrong. Kirstie needs to work on her stamina. Romeo has heat but he lacks refinement and control.
Who is going home? It came down to Petra & Dmitry, Chris Jericho & Cheryl Burke, and Kirstie Alley & Maks as “in jeopardy.” Kirstie & Maks were probably put there for dramatic effect and to try desperately (and probably in vain) to calm down Maks’ ego. They were announced “safe” first. Len said it’s no wonder he gets grumpy because there’s no justice. “Neither of them deserve to be there.” Two weeks ago Petra was on top of the leader board. Chris had his best dance last night. “It’s madness,” Len said. Well put, Grumpy.
Petra’s last words: Brooke Burke called Petra one of the loveliest stars they’ve ever had on the show. Petra said it’s been a life-changing journey and she made amazing friends. She said Dmitry put up with her for two months and Tom quipped “Yeah, that must’ve been tough.” She’s a diamond and she has the cutest accent. Dmitry called Petra the nicest person he’s ever known. Tears! We heart them.