DANA Ranking: 8 Last week: N/A Here’s why: Not a great way to make your debut on the Power Rankings. Dana’s comments were continually baffling, whether she was showing off her expensive shades or bragging about her son’s accomplishments. Also, how exactly did her son manage to learn Thai? Perhaps he’s auditioning for a role in The King and I, and he’s really a method actor?
KIM Ranking: 7 Last week: 4 Here’s why: Kim’s becoming tough to watch, between reminiscing over photos that are boring even to her housekeeper, and then her confusing phone conversation about ditching the BBQ. Yet again, Kim seems unable to adjust to the fact that her kids are adults now, and she can’t drag them everywhere she pleases. (Plus, there were hot dogs at that BBQ. Who says no to free hot dogs?!)
BRANDI Ranking: 6 Last week: N/A Here’s why: Brandi certainly brings the drama, which we like, but if it were our backyard that her son was peeing in, we wouldn’t be all that pleased. And is Brandi serious about not having the Internet? We guess she sticks to crazy-tweeting via her phone.
CAMILLE Ranking: 5 Last week: 6 Here’s why: Camille was a little too involved this week, but for a Housewife who’s been a bit quiet this season, we appreciated her comment regarding Dana that people with money don’t need to flaunt it. However, what we didn’t appreciate was getting details about the size of Kelsey’s you-know-what. Some things don’t need to be shared with the world, honey.
LISA Ranking: 4 Last week: 3 Here’s why: Okay, she got a little namedrop-y this week, but we are impressed that our little Lisa is hanging out with Fergie. On the other hand, Dr. Drew didn’t seem too excited about sending out that publicity-tweet for her. And we love how that shot of Ken basically summed up how most men feel about the royal wedding.
TAYLOR Ranking: 3 Last week: 5 Here’s why: No one seemed to actually see her eating at the BBQ, but she at least claimed that she had. It’s hard to know how she feels about Brandi; they got along when they were getting drinks, but then Taylor seemed put off by Brandi’s brash behavior at Adrienne’s. Then again, offending people seems to be Brandi’s favorite pastime!
ADRIENNE Ranking: 2 Last week: 1 Here’s why: She may not have wanted the fancy champagne glasses to be used for the BBQ (perhaps because she was worried that Lisa and Giggy might show up at the last minute), but she still went all-out with that party. (Even we were jealous about that awesome water slide.) And would anyone be shocked if it was crafty Adrienne who trained Jackpot on where to relieve himself (i.e., Paul’s closet)? Nope, we wouldn’t put it past her.
KYLE Ranking: 1 Last week: 2 Here’s why: Kyle’s back in the top spot, making that three out of the last four weeks! She was cracking us up left and right, with her hilarious takedowns of Dana’s Mensa-member son and Brandi’s lax parenting skills. Plus, we might have put her in the top spot solely for picking out that adorably frilly bathing suit for Portia. Dana is right: The woman has impeccable taste.