1. Politicians Greet The Modelstants! When ANTM is hanging stateside, they’re lucky if they can get a B-list celebrity to be a guest judge — but the show heads over to Greece and boom. The mayor, a bunch of politicians and other fancy randoms are waiting with bated breath for them to butcher the Greek language. We’re happy that these political guys and dolls took time out from the apparently less important job of saving Greece from economic collapse, to watch the top models strut their stuff. After all, if anyone can save this country, it’s Tyra.
2. Andre Deigns To Visit The All-Stars! One can only assume that Andre had to self-medicate in preparation for his trip to the Top Model mansion, because he seemed completely out of it. Poor guy’s voice was cracking like a pre-pubescent boy, and underneath his giant rice paddy hat was the face of fear. Obviously, he thought dressing up in monks’ robes would protect him from the madness, but it was only a few minutes after his arrival that the ladies went bat-crazy and started throwing plates at him.
3. Theater Nerds Invade The Mansion! Looks like Tyra paid another visit to the theater department at UCLA and plucked a few unsuspecting thespians from its midst. Poor things were dressed up as waitstaff and forced to have a bitch fight while skipping around the foyer, only to then make a quick exit to the unknown. They must be huge ANTM fans — after all they followed Rule #1: Get outta the house while you still can.
4. Laura Pours Olive Oil Into her Eyes! Places it’s acceptable to drizzle olive oil: a salad, bread, your butt, chest, and belly button. Places it’s unacceptable to drizzle olive oil: your eyeballs. We’re getting more and more concerned about Laura’s standing in this competition, especially now that she’s gone blind from salad dressing. The fact that no one stepped in and told our little bumpkin not to blind herself for the sake of the show is just further proof that they’re all losing it.
5. Lisa And Dominique Want The Bells And Whistles We've seen the modelstants dressed in some pretty whack outfits this cycle. Of course, it’s usually because they’re forced to wear them by Tyra. But this week, Lisa and Dominique proved that there are worse things than Queen Ty’s passion for fashion. Lisa asked to be dressed in light bulbs for her finale gown, which would be a great showcase for her electric personality, and Dominique asked to bling-out her va-jay-jay. That's right, she wants to strut down the runway with "dangly, metal-y, sparkly" charms all over her crotch. Suddenly, Tyra’s addiction to suspenders looks completely normal.