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Modern Family

Alex Dunphy’s Best Snarks From Modern Family

Just call her the Lisa Simpson of Modern Family!

Alex is the only Dunphy with a head full of smarts on her shoulders, and she brings some much-needed sass to her whack-pack fam. Check out her best snarks of all time! (These will work great on your annoying older sister ...)

10. Alex tries her hand at sarcasm: “Consider yourself lucky you didn't just get, like, felt up by your mom.”

There are worse things than being felt up by Claire “Hot Mom” Dunphy!

9. Haley: “If you do this you'll be a social piranha.”
Alex: “Yes, I'll be an Amazonian carnivorous fish.”

Even Amazonian Carnivorous fish have clicks!

8. Claire: “You're grounded for four weeks!”
Haley: “Why don't you just double it and make it 10?”
Alex: “Do you not see how much you need to study?!?”

The only math Haley knows is courtesy of the Spice Girls: Tonight is the night when 2 become 1.

Credit: Richard Cartwright /ABC    

7. Claire: “Tell me again why the violin wasn't for you.”
Alex: “It's too happy.”

Someone hand this girl a Bright Eyes compilation CD.

6. Alex: “If Haley got pregnant, would you ever pretend she got mono for a few months and then tell everyone the baby's yours?”

“If”? How about “when.”

5. Phil: “Care to make this interesting?”
Alex: “I don't think that's possible.”

If it’s not bound in leather and paginated, Alex wants nothing to do with it.

4. Haley: “Hey, check out that cute guy.”
Alex: “He's out of your league. He's reading a book.”

If he were reading Cosmo, Haley might have more luck.

Credit: Peter Stone/ABC Television Group © 2011 Disney    

3. Haley: “There are two kind of people: Popular girls, and girls like you. And you have been given a rare opportunity to go from the latter to the former.”
Alex: “The former to the latter.”

There’s no hope for this girl.

2. Manny: “Wouldn't it be funny if the Kiss Cam fell on us and we had to kiss?”
Alex: “We're related.”
Manny: “Not by blood.”
Alex: “Touch me and there'll be blood.”

Kissing Cousins!

1. Claire preps Alex for Halloween: “You're in a house of horrors being held against your will.”
Alex: “Yeah, I know, so why do I need the cage?”

Teenagedom is like being under permanent house arrest.

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11.14.2011 / 10:43 PM EDT by Mehera Bonner
Related: Modern Family, Quotes, Alex Dunphy

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