Andre Leon Talley’s 10 Craziest Moments on America’s Next Top Model
How do we love Andre Leon Talley? Let us count the ways. Or at least up to ten ways. The (now former)America’s Next Top Model judge de resistance has a voice like a peachy breeze, the posture of a giraffe, and the wardrobe of Norma Desmond.
We took a look back at some of Andre’s finest moments, quotations, and accessories, and collected our favorites here.
1. Rice Paddy Hat. Leave it to ALT to revive one of the least hip, least attractive, and least comfortable types of hatwear. Evoking poverty-stricken Chinese farmers, ALT merchandised his up with purple cloaks and ginormous Louis Vuitton luggage.
2. Cake and Tiny Cars. No one would deny that ALT is comfortable with his larger-than-life frame, but who knew he was comfortable being photographed wearing an XXXL pink Polo shirt and maroon velour pants, getting out of a tiny car, and eating a fluffy cake for all the world to see?
3. ALT Hangs With Plebs. Just because ALT is besties with Vogue Editor-in-Chief Anna Wintour doesn’t mean that he’s above visiting a bunch of wannabe models in their over-designed CW mansion.
4. “I feel like I’m in a cinematic moment of something wonderful,” said Andre during Cycle 17: All-Stars, Episode 6: “Coco Rocha.” And we swooned, because we understood this feeling. Though our cinematic moments usually have less to do with models in silly poses than guys with silly grins.
5. ALT Defines Drekitude: “Drekitude is the lowest point in the lowest ebb. It could be your look. It could be your shoes. It could be that you're standing wrong. Drek is a total, total, total hot mess.” To be honest, we’re obsessed with the word drek. Do you think Andre has magically unified the words “dreadful” and “wreck”?
6. No Tiaras For ALT. Andre is not a sucker for bright, shiny things, and he was not a fan of All-Stars’ Camille McDonald, whose walk and posturing made him say what we were all thinking: “I’m so absolutelyfatigué of Camille’s beauty pageantry.” And we are so absolutely enchanted by his perfect franglais.
7. Hee Haw Elegance. We think the phrase stands for itself, but for context, Andre was also fatigue of Laura Kirkpatrick and her ol’ country charm.
8. ALT Has a Salohn. And we want to go more than anything. When gazing at the stilts photo of Dominique and Kayla (who did not “tooch her booty” enough for the judges’ liking), he announced, “This could be in my salohhn!” Followed by, “With Kayla airbrushed out.” We’re imagining drag queens with lampshades on their heads standing motionless with platters of mini-cakes for guests.
9. Capes, Both Big and Small. ALT loves him a good cape. Whether he’s summoning Count Dracula in an enormous black cape, or simply taking a cashmere Louis Vuitton bedspread, throwing it over his shoulders, and dashing to the next room, dude wears capes like a lady.
10. Fashion Icon. Jokes aside, ALT is an icon in the fashion industry, and beloved by many a designer. For anyone interested in the serious story behind the sartorial wizard, we highly suggest you pick up his memoir, A.L.T. Andre, despite rumors to the contrary, did not just appear in Anna Wintour’s closet one day after she rubbed an old lamp. Girl has suffered, and lived to tell the tale.