10. Lisa Vanderpump finds a loophole! Lisa [about the Chippendales dancer named Ken]: “Ken”? Oh, well — that’s okay then!
9. Uh, we really don’t want to know. Lisa [about the “sock”]: You know, I haven’t seen something like that in years — you know Ken doesn’t wear his c*ck sock around.
8. C’mon Kyle — don’t jinx this party, too! Kyle Richards [about the white party]: We have a lot of evil people coming.
7. After seeing Lisa’s lap dance, we’re guessing we know the answer to this. Lisa: One minute, we’re shopping for wedding dresses, and the next minute we’re going to Vegas, shopping for naked men at the bachelorette party. Now let me think — which do I prefer?
6. In other words, off the charts! Lisa [to Taylor Armstrong, about Brandi Glanville’s party]: I said, “On one to ten, how bad was it?” And [Kyle] said it was more than ten.
5. Not even the Munchkins in the Lollipop Guild are that devoted to candy. Camille Grammer[about Dana Wilkey’s million-dollar lollipop necklace]: I can think of other things I’d put a million dollars into than a lollipop holder.
4. We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: We love Lisa! Lisa: What do you think — do I look suitably slutty for the mother of the bride?
3. Lisa has found a new hobby. Lisa [about the lap-dance contest]: Was it embarrassing? Yes. Do I want to do it again? Yes.
2. Camille tries to make sense of Taylor’s behavior. Camille: I’ve said before, she was in dire need of an exorcism that evening.
1. Lisa offers her services. Lisa: So how long did it take to knit your sock? Because I’m good at knitting.