We have a passionate Truebie fever, and the only cure is more Bill Compton!
This toothy gent is Bon Temps' original vamp, and he'll always have a special place in our hearts.
But is it just us, or does Bill need a slight personality overhaul? Check out five things we want to see from this bloodsucker when True Blood returns for season 5!
1. He Needs to Move on From Sookie!
You guys, Bill is all alone in the world. He has no family, no friends, and his one truebie love just broke up with him for, like, the fourth time in a row.
Bill spent most of season 4 twirling his pinkie ring in despair and listening to the distant sounds of Sookie and Eric's lovemaking, and it's time for him to get over it.
We know, we know, Bill loves nothing more that hearing himself say "Ah Luhv You Sookeh," but maybe it's time to for him to leave his fairy princess alone so he can work on himself. Because, really? There's a lot of work to be done.
2. A Fangtastic New Girlfriend
Bill loves to be in love, but he also loves having sex on tombstones and eating people. Maybe it's time that he found himself a nice, vampire girlfriend. You know, someone who he can sex up without getting hungry.
Bill was able to be his toothy self while he was dating Lorena, but sadly there are no eligible vampire bachelorettes in Bon Temps — except for Jessica.
Sure, she's technically his daughter, but it's not like Bill says "no" to vamp incest. He willingly had an affair with his mom, and need we remind you of the time he fangbanged his great-great-granddaughter? We're sensing a pattern.
3. The Return of His Linen Trousers
Remember back in the day when Bill wandered around Bon Temps with middle-parted hair and high-watered pants? What happened to those good times?
Nowadays Bill is all about cashmere sweaters and fine menswear, and we kind of miss his old, unfashionable look.
Anyone want to join us in a campaign to get this vamp out of his suit and back into his clothes from the 1800s?
4. A Hook-up With Eric — Yes, We Went There
Eric and Bill hate each other thanks to Sookie's adorable gap-tooth, but last season they bonded over their mutual distaste for The Authority. Also, we can't forget how they were tied up naked and then changed into matching pajamas for a mutual Sookie-gasm.
Eric is no stranger to bromance (RIP Talbot!), and we have a feeling Bill wouldn't be opposed to mixing things up in the bedroom. Is it possible that these bloodsuckers will make our wildest dreams come true and hook up next season?
5. More Violence
Every since Bill became King of Louisiana, he's been all about love not war. Sure, he murdered the occasional hater, but we miss Bill's unpredictably violent side.
Luckily, it came out when he and Eric teamed up to kill Nan Flanagan, so here's to hoping we'll see a lot more blood dripping out of Bill's mouth next season!