Jon [feigning ignorance of the whole Kristen Stewart cheating “scandal”]: “What have you been up to?”
Rob [in mock anger]: “I thought we had prepared this. I had a joke prepared. God dammit. I was all set up and ready to go.”
Jon brought out two tubs of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream.
Jon: “Now we’re just a couple of gals talking.”
Rob: “This is how you got me on the show.”
Jon: “Exactly.” [Eats more ice cream.] “Tell me everything.”
Rob: “This is the problem with actors. In every awkward interview situation...”
Jon interrupted to complain about the dripping ice cream.
Jon: “Here’s the problem with my show. We don’t have a f--king freezerl”
Jon started sipping his ice cream. Rob joked that he was avoiding eating the ice cream ‘cause he doesn’t want to “split my Spanx.” Jon said, yeah, he’ll blow up to 138 lbs.
Then Jon got slightly serious and asked if Rob was all right (considering the last two weeks have been non-stop cheating scandal coverage). He never mentioned Kristen by name, but the whole interview was like a therapy session.
Rob: “My biggest problem in my life is I’m cheap. I didn’t hire a publicist and every awkward interview, normally actors get these things scripted.”
Jon said, yeah, usually they talk about what questions will come up and prepare anecdotes. Rob says he’s going to hire a publicist. Jon said he should, but unless he has a time machine... Jon also referenced the huge crowd outside the studio. They’ve had presidents on the show but they’ve never had a line like the fans and “fat guys with cameras” trying to get photos of Rob.
Rob complimented the ice cream.
Jon: “The last time I had a bad breakup, Ben & Jerry got me through some of the tougher times. So I thought you and I could bond over this and talk about ‘Boy, you are better off. Kick her to the curb.’” (The audience loved that.)
They also talked about Rob's upcoming film Cosmopolis and Rob directly addressed Twilight fans. “I genuinely want to make Cosmopolis have a higher opening weekend than The Dark Knight.” Pause. “But the problem is, it’s only released in six cinemas. So it’s going to be a challenge.”
Rob said all fans should buy eight tickets. Jon added that they should also stack on top of each other.
All in all, a funny, casual, cute interview. Did you catch it? Rob definitely didn't seem heartbroken, didn't try to cash in on the scandal for sympathy and just came off as pretty darn charming. What did you think?