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True Blood

True Blood Season 5 Plot Lines That Should Have Never Happened

True Blood is some kind of wonderful, but with such a huge ensemble cast and so many enigmatic characters, it's natural that we get the occasional WTF plot line every now and then. While Season 5 was an all-around smash hit, there were a few tangential stories that were either not completely flushed out, or just completely random.

We've rounded up 5 story arcs from True Blood Season 5 that we wish had hit the cutting room floor.

1. Alcide and Rikki's Were-Sex

As much as we love watching Shirtless Alcide grunt his way through a sex scene, his relationship with Rikki seemed fleeting and incidental. Last time we checked, Alcide was in love with Sookie — and literally the next day, he was dressed up like Rambo and frolicing around a farm with the Rickster.

Who else thinks that Alcide and Sookie should have spent the season hooking up in her shower instead?

2. JD's Rise to Power

True Blood’s cast is already huge, so when new characters are thrown in, it's best if they come part and parcel with a familiar face (see: Eric and Nora.) Instead, JD was given his very own storyline, which we just weren't that invested in.

Louis Herthum did a great job portraying this power-hungry V-tripper, but every time he came on screen, we found ourselves yearning for our tried and Truebie friends of yesteryear. Where art thou, Eric's abs?

3. The Smoke Monster

We love Terry and Arlene with all our hearts, but up until this point they've been charming supporting characters. This season, Terry and Arlene were gifted with their very own completely tangential journey, which A) didn't add anything to the plot as a whole, and B) was kind of a yawn fest.

Then again, we kind of want to adopt a Smoke Monster. That thing was adorable.

4. Jason's Relationship With The Cat Lady

Remember that time when Jason met his cat-loving teacher at the grocery store — hah, as if Jason shops for groceries! — only to sex it up in her apartment, have an existential crisis, and leave?

Neither do we — mostly because we've blocked it out. Apparently, Jason's Cat Lady sex made him realize that he's a nymphomaniac who doesn't know the meaning of love, but the whole thing seemed a little random. Plus, it wasted valuable screen time that could have been spent on Eric's butt.

5. Lafayette's Trip To Mexico

Jesus was speared with an egg-covered fork last season, so it's only fair that the True Blood powers that be wanted Lafayette to mourn. He shaved his faux hawk and started wearing cowl neck sweaters for no reason, so did he really need to go down to Mexico, have his lips sewn up, and witness the most gruesome murder ever, too?

We don't think so. Lala's adventures across the border had no bearing on the plot in general, and even worse? When the story was abandoned mid-season, Lafayette stopped getting the screen time he deserves. Unacceptable — we need Lala's glittery doo-rag in our lives 24/7.

What did you think of Season 5, Truebies? Tell us your most WTF-worthy moments below!

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08.31.2012 / 07:24 PM EDT by Mehera Bonner
Related: True Blood, Top 10 Lists, True Blood Season 5

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