Wherein Aria Tells Ezra, “You’re Giving Me Your Old, Sweat-Covered Necklace? Gee, Thanks!”
Choosing the creepiest dad on this show is like choosing the least funny episode of Two and a Half Men (translation: there’s a lot of competition). Still, Byron (Chad Lowe) is doing his best to take the crown, especially once Aria (Lucy Hale) finds the page Harold wrote in Ali's (Sasha Pieterse) journal. Turns out, Byron met with Ali just before Labor Day, as she tried to extort more money from him about Meredith. Yes, Ali is quite the entrepreneur.
Aria also has plenty of present-day issues to deal with, including that mylar baby balloon she finds from “A” at Ezra’s door. Tell Ezra about his freakin’ baby already, Aria! And then Byron goes and blames Aria and her friends for the fire Meredith was in. Father of the year!
And in case you were keeping track, we’re pretty sure that was, oh, approximately the 3,796th fire that we’ve seen on the show. PLL’s pyrotechnics budget must be through the roof.
Wherein Hanna Decides Not to Invite Cousin Heshy to a Family Reunion Anytime Soon
Hanna (Ashley Benson) was clearly none too thrilled to have Mona wake her up in the middle of the night to say she’s been released from Radley, mainly because sleeping is probably Hanna’s favorite activity. But the big question is, why did Mona claim that she was forced to leave Radley when it was actually her idea, and what plans does she have in mind for her newfound freedom?
Since a majority of the core romances are in shambles, it’s a relief Hanna and Caleb (Tyler Blackburn) are still as cute as ever. But Lucas (Brendan Robinson) and Hanna’s scene was pretty darn precious, too, as they both admit to missing each other. And did Lucas really hurt his leg skateboarding? Lucas doesn’t exactly strike us as a Tony Hawk-type.
And by the way, who might Caleb’s dad be? That said, on this show, if you don’t know who someone’s dad is, Mr. Hastings is always a safe bet.
Wherein Emily Sees a Janitor Who is Far Less Trustworthy Than the One From Good Will Hunting
Considering Emily (Shay Mitchell) has the only halfway-decent dad on this show, we were worried to see Emily deceive him in order to sneak out of her house, since we’d hate for him to somehow snap and turn into a monster like all the other dads. Apparently, it doesn’t take much for these Rosewood dads to snap.
Still, we were glad Emily was able to join the girls in breaking into the janitor’s room, especially since Em was the one who realizes creepy Harold — who worked at the resort where Mona’s lair was — is now the school janitor and is in contact with Mona. What was he doing with all of Mona’s stuff? Uh, do we really need another creepy character on this show?
When the heck is Spencer (Troian Bellisario) gonna figure out Toby’s on the “A” team? She’s usually ridiculously perceptive, so this seems a tad out of character. Then again, she does seem to be getting a bad feeling about him, as she leaves the hot tub when she hears someone watching them. Frankly, we’re not sure that anything could convince us to leave a hot tub with a shirtless Toby in it.
And we don’t envy Spencer as she watches her brother Jason (Drew Van Acker) get cuddly with Mona. Jason had previously seemed to really care about Spencer, so the fact that he lies to her about understanding how she feels about Mona — only to have Mona dress his wound — was shocking! How is it that Jason can be interested in both Aria and Mona? The dude clearly does not have a type.
- So much to discuss! The craziest detail from the episode came at the very end, with Jason showing what might be a screwdriver-sized wound on his hip. Was he the one who got stabbed by Aria with that screwdriver on the Halloween train?
- We know that Mona was on the Halloween train — and now Hanna assumes it, too — so does this mean Jason was trying to kill Aria? Or maybe he was trying to save her and somehow got stabbed for his trouble? Then again, knowing PLL, this might be an unrelated injury, not unlike Holden’s red-herring bruise that ended up being a waste of time last season.
- What was Mona’s actual motive for returning to school — since she clearly has a motive? And was she responsible for the fire that injured Meredith? If so, why?
- What did Mona whisper to Lucas? We can only assume what she said has something to do with why Mona returned to school, and perhaps why Lucas had those pills in his backpack last season that he apparently got from Mona. So could Lucas and Mona have put that brain in Mona’s locker on purpose, in order for Mona to garner sympathy from the students?
- What exactly did Spencer hear while she was in the hot tub with Toby? It doesn’t seem like a member of the “A” team would be spying on her while Toby is there, so maybe someone — perhaps Lucas — is watching them in order to protect her? Or maybe someone on the “A” team is worried Toby is giving away information to the Liars? Still, if you think we’re going to complain about seeing a shirtless Toby in the hot tub, you don’t know us that well.
- Who is the dude whose bike “A” tampers with during the final scene? It sounds like his friends refer to him as “Ron,” and he is holding a textbook that reads “Academic Decathlon” and “Eastern Pennsylvania.”
- Was Lucas the one Toby was trying to run down with his car? Does this mean that Lucas is not involved with the “A” team — or that he was once involved but has somehow defected? Or was someone else on that skateboard, like maybe Jason?
- Whenever this show sets up a mystery — like they’re doing with the identity of Caleb’s dad — it tends to have some relevance to the main storyline. So we’re wondering if his dad will end up being someone whom we’ve already met.
- Might Meredith be a suspect in Ali’s murder, now that we know Byron was being blackmailed by Ali about his relationship with her? The fact that Meredith has become such a prominent character has us suspicious. It also seems that whoever caused that fire may know something about Meredith that we don’t know.
- PLL often likes to use classroom lectures to hit at major plot points, so we’re wondering what Meredith’s “check and balances” speech was supposed foreshadow. And speaking of Meredith, we can’t help but wonder if she had an ulterior motive for taking Aria’s phone. No one ever takes a phone on this show without tampering with it extensively.
- What’s Harold’s deal? This desk clerk-slash-school janitor clearly has some kind of relationship with Mona, and we’re not sure why he wants to be at the school. All we know is, considering Rosewood High has also hired the psychotic Meredith and inappropo Ezra, this school needs to start conducting stricter background checks.
Other Things That Need To Be Discussed:
- Would Rosewood High really keep transcripts of every parent-principal conference that takes place, such as the transcript Caleb finds of Mona’s parents’ meeting? This seems to be a surprisingly meticulous measure for a school that is completely lax about absolutely everything else, including letting non-students come and go on the campus as they please.
- We love that T-shirt that Aria was wearing this week, with the patriotic skull and the cut-off sleeves. Paging Bristol Palin.
- We do love Hanna’s feisty grandma, but why on earth did she start singing the national anthem in front of Hanna and her friends? Hasn’t Hanna endured enough pain already?
Catch the next episode of PLL Season 3 on Tuesday, January 15 at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC Family.