Chris Harrison’s Tragic Personal Goal: “I Need to Get a Life”
Please join us as we say a little prayer for Chris Harrison. Despite the fact that this dude makes a living playing cupid on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, he is tragically alone in this world. So, so alone.
Chris recently went through a heartbreaking divorce from his wife, Gwen Jones, and apparently he has no idea how to get back into the dating game. Why? Because he doesn't have a life. His words, guys.
"My New Year's Resolution was to get a life in 2013, because I have none," Chris tells People. "I've realized that there's a reason I'm single, and that's [because] I work way too damn much... I've figured, wow I don't have a social life. So I'm trying to figure that out."
That's right, Chris' life goal is to make friends, and who knows? Maybe even go on a date — although apparently all of his potential lovers want him to fly them to Cannes and he wants everyone to know that he does not, in fact, have a private jet... or the ability to balance work and play. "Right now I don't have that balance," he explains as we cry about how tragic he is. "But that's my goal this year. My goal this year is to get a life."
Um, this is the saddest story we have ever heard. Let's all give Chris Harrison a cyber hug — after all, his internet friends are the only friends he really needs.