At the start of the episode, no one knows what to do with Snow, who’s in a bit of a shame spiral after killing Cora. Snow takes out some aggression by firing arrows into the nearest tree — nice shooting, Snow! — until she finds a now-wooden August in a trailer. We must say — he’s still cute, even made of wood.
Neal wants Emma to meet Tamara, and so she begrudgingly joins them for the most awkward bagel breakfast known to mankind. Later, Neal shows Henry’s book to Tamara in an effort to explain who he is, but she doesn’t believe him and thinks he’s trying to get with Emma. Or so she claims.
Snow and Marco want the Blue Fairy’s help in turning August back into a non-wooden human, but she says he became wooden by his own poor choices. Marco also tells Snow that he’s sorry for putting August in the wardrobe, and so she slaps him — but claims she didn’t mean to. Whatever you say, Snow.
Tamara wants August to leave Storybrooke, but he spots Tamara's photo and realizes she’s up to no good. He tries to call Emma from the police station, but Tamara gets there first and attacks him. So if you were worried that Cora leaving would mean this show won’t have enough evil people, fear not. Tamara is more than ready to fill her shoes.
August stumbles out of the police station as Emma arrives, and he says her name as he croaks. Luckily, since August finally did the right thing (for once), the Blue Fairy can save him — kinda. August is back to his boyhood self, although he can’t remember his old life. Uh, who knew this show would borrow a plot from the movie 17 Again? Sigh — if only Zac Efron could join this show.
Snow comes clean to David in a sweet scene by confessing to wanting Regina to kill her, and that her heart is turning black. David adorably tells her she won’t become evil, and then he touches her heart. Aww! In the meantime, maybe Snow should go on Dr. Oz’s show, as maybe he would have some heart tips? The guy is quite the cardio specialist.
Greg and Regina discuss his dad, with Regina claiming he has disappeared. Sounds like a job for Liam Neeson’s charcter in Taken. But the really juicy stuff involving Greg happens at the end, as the “Her” in his phone is Tamara, and he and Tamara kiss. Perhaps the bad girls really do get all the guys.
The “C” Word — Not “Cancer,” But “Crazy”
In the flashback, we see August seeking treatment from “The Dragon” in Hong Kong. This kooky healer promises to fix his ailment in exchange for his dad’s string and a whole bunch of cash. It’s here that August meets Tamara, who claims to be suffering from cancer but actually just wants magic. She’s pulling the old “faking cancer to get magic” scam that you always hear about.
Tamara ends up with the potion and confronts the Dragon to get more magic. He doesn’t appreciate this, and so he gets all smoky, but then he falls to the floor. Apparently, Tamara is not afraid of a little smoke —even though we would be.
We then see that Tamara had been spying on August and Neal when August promised to write Neal a postcard about the curse being lifted. Tamara then purposely gets Neal to spill her coffee all over her, which she covers up with his scarf. This is why lids exist, people.
— Who is Tamara’s grandmother? Could she be from Fairytale Land — and might she be related to the Fairy Godmother from Season 1, whom Gold killed? Time to find their family tree. We also wonder when Neal will realize he’s being two-timed by her. Poor Neal! But what did happen to Greg's dad?
— So August’s adult self is definitely gone? Say it ain’t so! It looks like Neal and Emma really will end up together — which August apparently wants to happen. Hmm. However, we do think it will be cute for Henry to have another kid his own age to hang out with for once.
— Just how evil will Snow get? Then again, we don’t really begrudge her for slapping Marco, since the guy kinda had it coming. If only she could now slap Tamara...