Game of Thrones Season 3: Tyrion Lannister’s Best Lines
Game of Thrones has always dealt with some heavy material, and Season 3 only upped the ante. Mutilation, dismemberment, the Red Wedding ... there was a lot to turn your stomach. Fortunately, Tyrion Lannister was always there to lighten the mood with a good quip or an interesting insight, even at his own disastrous wedding party.
For your amusement, we've gathered our favorite Tyrion quotes from Season 3.
On Cersei's sense of humor. "Grand Maester Pycelle made the same joke. You must be proud to be as funny as a man whose balls brush his knees." (Season 3, Episode 1)
On trust. "Is there an idiot in any village who trusts Littlefinger?" (Season 3, Episode 2)
On finances. "I'm quite good at spending money, but a lifetime of outrageous wealth hasn't taught me much about managing it." (Season 3, Episode 3)
On revenge. "I feel the need for actual revenge. Against the actual person who tried to have me killed." (Season 3, Episode 4)
On accurate self evaluation. "She's finally free of him, and now you give her to me? That's cruel." (Season 3, Episode 5)
Further accurate self evaluation. "It's hard to say which of the four of us is getting the worst of this arrangement." (Season 3, Episode 6)
On evil notions. "I don't pay you to put evil notions in my head. The ones already in there don't need company." (Season 3, Episode 7)
On duty. "It's my wedding night. My tiny drunk cock and I have a job to do." (Season 3, Episode 8)
On knowing what you're good at. “Drinking and lust, no man can match me in these things. I am the god of tits and wine." (Season 3, Episode 8)
On his father and nephew. "You just sent the most powerful man in Westeros to bed without his supper." (Season 3, Episode 10)
On a cryptic note about a certain wedding. "Is that bad poetry, or is it supposed to mean something?" (Season 3, Episode 10)
On talent: "It's not easy being drunk all the time. Everyone would do it if it were easy." (Season 3, Episode 10)
Rebecca Martin is an editor at Wetpaint Entertainment. Follow her on Twitter @BeccaDMartin.