Tim Halperin: This 23-year-old advertising sales rep says he had a crush on J. Lo when he was in elementary school. (Way to make a gal feel old, Tim!) Dude even asked Jennifer how old she was. Despite the slip-ups, he made it to Hollywood after delivering an impressive rendition of “She Will Be Loved.” Randy said no to Tim (what up, dawg?), but Jennifer and Steven thought he had potential. J.Lo also thought he had a “special tone” to his voice.
Brothers Mark and Aaron Gutierrez: So, we have two cute brothers who are funny and talented too? Not to mention they look like they just walked out of a J.Crew catalog? Yeah, of course they sailed on through to Hollywood. Mark Gutierrez, a 28-year-old substitute math teacher, and his brother Aaron, a 27-year-old shoe salesman, sang a soulful duet of “Lean on Me” after joking around outside the audition room. Luckily, the funny bros had some serious talent too. “It was Godlike the way you guys sang,” Steven said. “If two people could sing that way together, it’s unbelievable.” Well, we don’t know about Godlike, but we’ll be looking for these cuties during Hollywood Week.
We won’t even get into the telemarketer who sounded like a dying lamb, or the guy who literally dropped trou while singing “Pants on the Ground.” Let’s focus on the positive, shall we?
So, American Idol is supposed to be singing competition, a right? We’re just checking because tonight’s L.A. auditions seemed more like some weird comedy reality show with a couple decent singers in between. Where do they find these people?
The contestants who made us laugh loudest:
Matthew “Big Stats” Frankel: He’s the CEO of Matthew Scott Frankel Productions and the proud owner of a bus pass (he’s green, people!). Big Stats — that’s his hip-hop name, natch — showed up in a suit, bragging that he once produced a compilation album that featured Chaka Khan. (We’re thinking that means he burned some songs to a CD that included a song by Chaka.) Dude busted out a rap that made us feel almost as awkward as Big Stat’s roommate looked on camera.