Recap

Sheesh. Why would Victoria Henley want to eat when the girl who had to lick the floor next to stale pizza AND A COCKROACH went home on America's Next Top Model Cycle 19, Episode 7: “The Girl Who Licks the Floor”? That could put you off food forever.

The eliminated girl — Allyssa Vuelma — was “awesome size,” as opposed to “curvy” or...

Someone call Victoria Henley’s mom and share the good news! Our quirky obsession survived the goth Victorian steampunk circus shoot and apparently won’t be arrested for killing her fake boyfriend after America's Next Top Model Cycle 19, Episode 6: “The Girl Who Gets Pwn’d.” Now we just have to make sure she starts eating and doesn’t completely fall apart...

But … but … we thought Leila Goldkuhl would be in the America's Next Top Model Cycle 19 finale! Maybe it will still happen, since Leila left Episode 5: “The Girl Who Sings for Alicia Keys” but could still return later this season, if fans voted for her over the summer. She might actually have a chance. She’d have a better chance if voting were live (hint,...

Some people really shouldn’t be caught dead on camera. It’s also a bad idea to be caught dead — or alive — admitting you voted for “mean girl” Kristin Kagay on America's Next Top Model, just based on her pretty blonde looks. Do you stand by your votes now? What a shame real zombies didn’t shuffle onto Cycle 19, Episode 4: “The Girl Who Does...

Finally! No, not finally Maria Tucker quit America's Next Top Model — although, no complaints about being down to just one person name-dropping Harvard every five minutes. Finally, ANTM had a fantastic photo shoot, the kind that reminds us how this show is sometimes genuinely good at showcasing models. It's too bad Maria had no problem sticking her head out of the wall as a hunting...