For the first time since learning that “the real world” means laying off the Zimas in order to wake before noon, we actually looked forward to the weekend coming to a close so we could get back to work on Monday. Why would we do that? Because today, August 11, marks the second installment of the reality television gem that is Bachelor in Paradisethe show that proves looking good in a bikini can be considered a personality trait.


The only downside to a show that openly encourages peeing a circle around someone you just met is that while everyone currently residing at casa cuckoo is a delight, not all participants can stay in Tulum forever. Two contestants will be eliminated in tonight’s episode, and since the ladies were on the chopping block last week, it means the men are the ones retiring their leis this go around. So whose chest will we gaze upon for the last time in tonight’s episode?

Before we get to the Rose Ceremony, lets take a gander at the dates. Incoming Bachelors Chris Bukowski and Zack Kalter each arrive with a shiny new date card and both opt to take Clare Crawley, aka the raccoon whisperer, on a love quest. One man treats her to a couple’s massage and another takes her on a tour of Tulum Village. Looks like that raccoon was Clare’s spirit animal, and the woodland creatures are now making sure all her love prayers are answered!

Despite getting up close and personal with Elise Mosca last week, Dylan Petitt uses his date card to canoodle with Sarah Herron. Apparently, Dylan got a little jelly that blondie Elise got some smoochies from another man and now he isn’t having her sloppy seconds. Marcus Grodd also gets a date card, and he uses it to take sea foam frolicker Lacy Faddoul to dinner at an eco park.

After all the dates are done it’s time for the ladies to bequeath their beaus with bouquets. So who gets whose love flower?

Michelle Money gives her rose petals to Marquel Martin, Lacy finally realizes she has to pick one PDA partner and gives her flower to Marcus over Robert Graham, Clare decides Zack is a better Mr. Right Now than Chris, and AshLee Frazier fashions a collar out of her flower stem and “gifts” it to Graham Bunn’s neck.

The Rose Ceremony shocker to end all Rose Ceremony shockers? Elise still wants babies with Dylan, but he’s still sore she stole kisses elsewhere, so when she tries to get him to pluck her bloom he says, “thanks, but no thanks.” He’d rather leave Paradise for-evah than sip coladas and watch the sunset with her. Oh snap! So she gives her wilted petals to Chris. Congrats Chris!

That leaves Sarah with final flower power. Despite Dyls sharing a date with her earlier, Sarah doesn’t save him — she hands her rose off to Robert, ensuring the Rob-Lacy-Marcus triangle will tango on into next week. Wee!

So who goes home? Sort of of his own accord, Dylan flees, followed by Ben Scott, who kind of needn’t have bothered to show up in the first place — amiright? But don’t you fret for Ben — he’s got a girlfriend back home, which is why none of the ladies saw fit to ply him with pollen.

Tell us what you think of this week’s eliminations in the comments? Are you sad to see Dylan go? Do you even know who Ben Scott is?

Source: Reality Steve