Moving on to less creepy things, let’s talk about the grand gesture that Doctor Paul makes. He surprises Cam at the lab — of course, Annie Oakley is still going at it — and gets her to put the gun down long enough for him to admit he’s a workaholic. But one who cares about her more than his job. And he can prove it too. He bought her a scarf! Huh? The only catch is she has to meet him for dinner to get it. And she does. She even blows off work to do it. Aww.
Meanwhile, Booth and Brennan engage (no, not “get engaged” — they’re saving that for a later episode... we hope) in some name-calling of the victim. Booth calls Ed a moron, nitwit, and doofus for not realizing that being married to three women (and three sisters at that) would result in jealousy and drama. Brennan does something totally out of character: She agrees with Booth and laughs, admitting that Ed was maybe a bit of a nitwit.
But the mystery of who shot Ed remains. The material found in his body indicates that he was shot lying down, because the debris from the ground bounced back and lodged in his rib cage. Hodgins discovers that said particulates are digested pecan fragments, aka turkey poop. Want to guess who feeds turkeys? The victim’s father-in-law, Dan Lambert. Find the culprit, find the bullet. Once the evidence has been retrieved, Dan admits to killing Ed. Talk about a happy ending! No? Oh you want to talk about the real happy ending?
Booth and Brennan in a bar talking about complicated love and making googly eyes at one other? It doesn’t get much happier than this…
Booth: You can love a lot of people in this world, but there’s only one person you love the most.
Brennan: How do you know?
Booth: You just know.
Brennan: But what if you let that person get away?
Booth: That person is not going anywhere.
Sigh. End scene.
Meanwhile Booth and Brennan meet with the victim’s family. Or should we say families? Brennan finally puts one and two wives together when she sees pictures of what she so tactfully calls their “genetically deformed” kids. (Their large heads indicate that they’re all close in age, but too close in age for all 11 to be from the same mother.)
Booth wonders how the sisters’ dad could be “cool with this,” but after meeting with him, finds him to be more “on the fence,” as farmers would say. He doesn’t agree with what his daughters are doing, but he wants them to be happy. Booth later learns it’s the older sister who’s not “cool with this,” as she secretly filed for divorce from her hip-thrusting hubby six weeks ago. The reason? “Ed was having an affair” with a fourth woman. Booth later quips to Brennan, “How’s that for happiness?”
Guess it’s hard to be happy when someone is trying to poison you. Cam discovers high levels of radium in Ed’s body, but not your average over-the-counter kind of poison, natch. This radium salt can only be found where science experiments take place. Let’s say in college laboratories... where Ed’s mistress was attending grad school?
Sweets puts her under the bright light and learns that the radium salt in the lab went missing shortly after the three wives came in to confront her about the affair. Interesting, my dear Watson. Needless to say we were shocked — shocked — to see the box of radium salt turn up at the sister wives’ house. Sister number three fesses up to using it as a way to get more time with Ed. Were you confused like we were as to how killing a man gives you more time with him? Turns out she didn’t mean to kill him; she just wanted to make him sick. Oh okay, that’s less confusing. Apparently when he’s under the weather, their weird twist on a chore chart determines which sister gets Ed when, and it clearly states that when he’s sick, he stays with sister number three. Still with us?
We’re finding it extremely difficult to focus on this week’s episode with the teaser they just played for next week. Special Agent Hottie picks out a wedding ring? And after the looks he was giving Brennan tonight? Let’s just say we’re pretty confident that rock’s not going to be flashing across the TV on some blonde journalist’s hand. Hallelujah!
Okay, sorry, back to tonight’s episode, “The Sin in the Sisterhood,” which is brought to you by the word “marriage.” The whole thing is loaded with references to “till death do us part.” The victim, Ed, was a polygamist for goodness sake. He had three wives, all of whom are sisters. His body turns up in a cornfield, with a gunshot wound to the chest.
Back at the Jeffersonian, Cam is talking to anyone who will listen about her love life, or lack thereof. She’s frustrated about constantly being blown off by Doctor “He’s Not My Boyfriend, We Just See Each Other Once in a While” Paul. Even Booth offers up advice: “If you think this guy is the one, then don’t let him get away.” Regretting anything in particular there, Seeley?
Too bad he doesn’t get to see Bones dry humping the table with the dead body on it. That would have sealed the deal. “This guy spent a lot of time supporting his weight on his hands while engaging in a repetitive motion,” she says. Please don’t do that again, Bones.
It’s bad enough we have to see sexually frustrated Cam frustrating everyone in the office by channeling Annie Oakley. File “repeatedly firing a loaded gun into a weird contraption filled with blue goo” under How to Lose Friends and Alienate People. We had to turn the volume down for the rest of the episode because everyone was walking around with earplugs and yelling at one other.