Monday’s all-new Castle didn’t let us down. It was chock-full with hilarious encounters, fiery comebacks and enough awkward moments to last us…well, until next week at least. From the reappearance of Meredith to a murder used to cover up a planned escape, Season 5, Episode 10: “Significant Others” made us laugh and cringe all at the same time. It was so good, in fact, that it was nearly impossible to narrow down this week’s top quotables.

Check of our top picks from Castle, Season 5, Episode 10: “Significant Others,” below. Did we miss your favorites? Be sure to add them in the comments section.  

18. Martha: Richard, your ex-wife is here.
That’s enough to send shivers down Castle’s spine.

17. Beckett (to Castle): I’m not meant to be the bad guy in this case. You are.
She has a point.

16. Beckett: Men are clueless
Lanie: Men, or just Castle?
Best friends always know!

15. Beckett: Men are known to do stupid things when it comes to their ex-wives.
Statistics?

14. Lanie: This is Meredith we’re talking about. The deep-fried Twinkie Castle has “ex-sex” with whenever she rolls into town.
All things that are bad for you.

13. Castle (to Ms. Peterman): You may not have killed Michelle, but you certainly murdered that original Zaozirny.
May it rest in peace.

12. Ms. Peterman: No, dear. The bitch is the skank you paid to have sex with you.
Oh, snap!

11. Castle: No, both of my divorces were amicable.
Beckett: Yeah, a little too amicable.
Happy ex-wife, happy life?

10. Espo: Letting an ex stay with you while you’re with someone else? That’s like throwing gasoline on firework.
You said it!

9. Castle: Your place is still being fumigated and my loft is overrun by redheads.
Sounds like reason enough for a staycation.

8. Castle: It just seemed heartless to kick her out and send her to a hotel.
Beckett: Really, Castle? ‘Cause you just tried sending me to one.
Castle, try diamonds. We here they works wonders in situations like these.

7. Beckett: Button up, kitten. We’re going home.
Aww, who cares if it was sarcastic? She just said “we” and “home” in the same sentence.  

6. Castle: It’s The Bachelor meets Homeland.
Didn’t a new season just start?

5. Castle: Interesting. On the list of things you lost, you didn’t include your wife.
Billy Piper: She never was my favorite trophy.
Harsh!

4. Castle: Is this as bad as it seems?
Espo: No. It’s much worse.
Probably not the answer he was looking for.  

3. Ryan: What happens when worlds collide?
Espo: Boom!
That’s the real apocalypse.

2. Beckett: I have a dinner date with your ex-wife, remember?
A phrase that should be banned from the English language.

1. Martha: This isn’t a flophouse, darling. You gotta stop letting freeloaders just live here.
Castle: Please tell me you see the irony.
We do.