1. Alexis is Rejected!
Whoadthunk Alexis Never-Missed-a-Homework-Assignment Castle wouldn’t get into her college of choice? It’s not just Alexis who’s stunned — Castle didn’t want her to go to school like 2,000 miles away, but he never thought she wouldn’t get in. Frankly, neither did we!
2. The Victim is Missing!
Although Alexis’s rejection is serious business, there are more pressing matters at hand. There’s a murder in NYC — shocking, right? — but when the cops reach the crime scene, there’s a lot of blood, but no body.
Obv, solving a crime without a victim is nearly impossible. But what’s worse is Captain Victoria Gates is really giving our detectives a hard time about not being able to crack this case. Is this lady serious?
3. Frozen Corpses!
When the Castle crew finally gets a clue about their victim’s whereabouts, they’re led into a strange, blue-and-grey monochrome chamber that’s lined with vessels that hold — what else? — cryogenically frozen bodies. Oy. X-Files flashbacks, anyone?
Eventually, we learn this place is called Passage Ways, and houses the bodies of people who want to be frozen until some time in the future, including Mr. Hamilton — the victim.
4. The Ambrosia Project
What’s ironic about Hamilton’s untimely death is that he was a life extension researcher. Hamilton’s main life work was named after the nectar of the gods, which was supposed to give eternal life. But Hamilton’s project wasn’t quite so sweet; he was working on pharmaceutical implants to keep them from aging. Weird, right?
Even weirder — Hamilton’s project was funded by a porn mogul. Eesh. And did we mention Hamilton and his BFF Dr. Boyd were conducting weird experiments on humans in a shady hotel room for over a month? Yeah. That, too.
5. Where Head Meets Body
Victoria “Iron” Gates agreed to let Passage Ways keep Hamilton’s head in exchange for his body so the cops could try to match the bullets that killed him. While we get why they needed the body, what really shocked us was how easily Gates agreed to the swap. We didn’t know she had an easygoing bone in that rigid body!
6. Heads Will Roll!
Mr. Hamilton’s head was stolen! But who took it? Eventually, our detectives discover Dr. Boyd — Hamilton’s BFF — is housing Hamilton’s head.
If it isn’t weird enough that this guy is hanging out with his dead colleague’s cranium, what’s even more ridiculous is that he tries to escape with it when Caskett busts into his apartment. He climbs out the fire escape — head in arms — but drops it into a trashcan!
Um, oops? Thank goodness Castle is able to retrieve it.
7. Brain Tumor!
Mr. Hamilton’s head is holding more secrets than we ever could’ve imagined. He had a brain tumor!
8. Cyanide Goodbyes
Once it’s been made very clear that Mrs. Hamilton murdered her husband, the lady cyanides herself into a cold death. While we should maybe be sad, we’re just happy those two kooks are done-zo.