Keep the lights on, American Horror Story fans. This episode was a particularly horrific one. Here's a recap of what went down in Coven Episode 7, "The Dead."
As the episode starts, we see a flashback of a very-much in-one-piece Kyle (Evan Peters) getting tattoos with his frat brothers. Flash forward to the present, and stitched-together Kyle is chained up in the Robichaux greenhouse. He sees his frat bros' tattoos on his limbs and seems to finally realize what happened to him. Zoe (Taissa Farmiga) talks like she wants to shoot him to correct her mistake, but when Kyle tries to shoot himself, she stops him.
After newly-resurrected Madison (Emma Roberts) devours all the food in the kitchen — trying to not feel so numb — Queenie (Gabourey Sidibe) takes Delphine (Kathy Bates) to a fast food joint. The drive-thru attendant asks if they want to supersize their order, and Delphine hilariously says to Queenie, "Do we dare?"
Once they're devouring their burgers — Delphine amazed by how delicious 21st-century food is — Delphine convinces Queenie that Q will never feel at home at her otherwise-white coven.
Hank calls Cordelia (Sarah Paulson) in the middle of the night to tell her he misses her, and the camera pans out to reveal that he has surrounded himself with guns. (Foreshadowing!)
Cordelia, too blind with rage to sleep — ba-da-boom! — wanders out of her room and runs into Madison — seeing her memories, including the one of Fiona (Jessica Lange) murdering her.
Speaking of whom, Fiona is on still her ill-advised date with the handsome stranger we know to be the Axeman (Danny Huston). To her, though, he's just a "sax man." (Ha!) She's rapidly losing hair and clearly wanting to feel sexy in spite of it, so she sleeps with the Axeman. They apparently have electric chemistry, because the light bulbs in the dingy apartment shatter.
Zoe tries to get Kyle to remember his ability to speak by teaching him rudimentary words, but he spazzes out. When Zoe leaves to talk to Cordelia, Madison bonds with Kyle about their mutual experience in coming back to life.
Meanwhile, Queenie goes to Laveau's hair salon, and Laveau (Angela Bassett) offers her a home there, saying, "Voodoo doll belongs in the house of voodoo." The price of admission? Queenie has to deliver Delphine to the salon.
Back at Robichaux, Cordelia talks to to Zoe about Zoe's impressive power: "You are one hot s—t witch." She tells Zoe that their enemy is not the Laveau but Fiona, saying that Fi killed Madison because the latter was a threat to Fi's reign as Supreme. "If she even thinks you're next, you're next," Cordelia warns. "We're going to kill my mother. Kill her once. Kill her good. Kill her dead."
After that breezy little chat, Zoe goes back to her room — only to walk in on Kyle and Madison humping furiously.
Speaking of sex, we catch up with Fiona and the Axeman on their proverbial morning after — and Fiona seems totally turned off by his creepiness.
The Axeman reveals that he knows Fiona better than she thinks — he'd been watching her her whole life as a ghost hitherto stuck in the walls of Robichaux. He first loved her like a daughter, but as she grew and grew more powerful, he fell for her. Fiona, justifiably freaked, peaces out.
Back at Robichaux, Spalding (Denis O'Hare) wakes up in his attic room to find his hands bound and Zoe watching over him. He is surprised to find he can talk — Zoe found his tongue in a box of Myrtle's and restored it.
Zoe interrogates him about Madison's death, and Spalding — unable to tell a lie — reveals that Fiona did indeed commit the crime. Zoe, somewhat inexplicably, stabs Spalding in the heart. "You're done talking," she seethes.
Queenie and Delphine have a heart-to-heart, and Delphine reveals that her one regret hails from her first lifetime, when she murdered the newborn son of her husband's slave mistress and used the baby's blood for a beauty treatment. Queenie is horrified, as are we all.
Meanwhile, Fiona contemplates shaving her hair off but chickens out. She ends up back at the bar where the Axeman performs and offers to buy him a drink.
At Robichaux, Madison needles Zoe about their mutual attraction to Kyle. (Yeah, because Frankensteins are so hot.) She invites Zoe to bed with her and Kyle, and Zoe goes along with it.
Queenie takes Delphine to Laveau's salon under the guise of getting Delphine a haircut, and the latter realizes a makeover isn't in the cards when Laveau reveals herself. As Delphine screams, Laveau locks her up, takes out a scythe, and offers Queenie the first cut.
In the very next shot, Laveau applies what could only be Delphine's blood to her face, just like Delphine did with the blood of her slaves. "Beautiful," Laveau gushes as she looks at her own reflection.
What did you think of this episode? Let us know in the comment section below!