It’s a shame no one can yell “Cut!” and have the Dancing With the Stars Season 13 cast redo their Week 4 routines. Most of the dancers either matched their Week 3 scores or went down in points. Ricki Lake, on the other hand, retained her top spot on the leaderboard for the third week in a row getting the first 10s of the season — putting Psycho killer Derek Hough even closer to his fourth Mirror Ball trophy. Derek + Tango = 10s. That’s just how it is.
At the end of the night, nine points separated Ricki’s 29 from Carson Kressley’s low-scoring 20 out of 30. So will this mark the last voyage for the ballroom’s most fabulous pirate? Or will Nancy Grace’s bull-free Paso Doble mean the end for our fake boyfriend Tristan MacManus? Is anyone thinking Chaz Bono will go home or is he safe again — especially since his mama Cher cried for him in the audience?
Read on for a full recap of DWTS Season 13, Episode 4:
DWTS troupe numbers — The DWTS pro troupe performed the opening number with Louis Van Amstel, who choreographed the routine. Is this the first time they’ve had a fire in the middle of the ballroom, as opposed to Carrie Ann Inaba shouting that someone is on “fiiiiiiiiyahhhh”? Love the shirtless Star Wars part. Hot! Was that Sasha Farber doing all those flips? What a showoff. Love it. Later in the show the pros returned for more movie score dancing. Val and his partner were gorgeous out there, but they did a lift. Are they saying lifts are OK tonight?
1. Chynna Phillips & Tony Dovolani — Tango to "Mission: Impossible" — Chynna needs to focus and listen to Tony so they can take their Tango to the next level. That’s what Tony says, anyway. Tony sounds snippy in rehearsals. Come on Tony “The Teeth,” you have to be patient! Chynna seems to be very amenable. She looks hot in her costume, kind of Audrina-ish. Oh my! Tony propels down Tom Cruise-style to start the routine. This dance should have more pizzazz. It should be sharp and sexy and instead it just looks pained. Not her best by a lot. But Tony’s pants are straight-up sexy. And the boots!
JUDGES: Len Goodman said the challenge is for the professionals because they have to maintain the character of the dance but still show everyone a bit of flavor of the film. Len thought they got the character of the dance right. However, “You know what happened. It all went up the Swanee River.” Bruno Tonioli said she was hot but lost the plot. Carrie Ann said Chynna got lost but at least she didn’t lose her composure. Chynna looked so upset and Carrie Ann and Tom reminded her this is supposed to be fun and the prize is kind of silly. Tony limped up to the Celebriquarium. Chynna said she got lost with all the smoke on the ground and everything. The smoke monster claims another victim! Brooke said it happened to her, too. Brooke really wants to dance again, doesn’t she. SCORES: Carrie: 7, Len: 7, Bruno: 7 = 21 out of 30.
Vote for Team CHYNNADOVE: 1-800-868-3404
2. David Arquette & Kym Johnson — Paso Doble to "Indiana Jones" — Before this routine, there’s a quick shot of Cher, Courteney Cox and Billy Baldwin as the A-listers in the audience. David says he has dyslexia and left/right scrambles in his brain. But he has laughter in his voice when he talks and everything he says sounds cute. What a great attitude to have. He swings onto the dance floor for his opening. He looks hot with those arm tats, saving Kym from whatever. Fun routine!
JUDGES: Bruno said “I love the way you crack your whip … tight muscles and tight pants.” Bruno is in love again. Carrie Ann said “David saves the day!” Carrie Ann loved every minute. He was in control. Len liked the entry in and his attitude. After that it was all “Temple of Doom.” The audience hates that. David questioned Len’s statement that he shouldn’t have stamped his feet. It becomes Len vs. Bruno on tight buttocks and posture. Yay, they’re fighting again! They were way too nice last week. It was weird. SCORES: 8, 7, 8 = 23 out of 30.
Vote for Team Good Times: 1-800-868-3406
3. Carson Kressley & Anna Trebunskaya — Viennese Waltz to "Pirates of the Caribbean” — Carson is hilarious. He’s a pirate this week and he looks good. They have Storm the sexy stunt man come in and teach him some sword work. Love the fake parrot on his head at the start of the routine. They start with swordplay then get into the heart of the routine. There are a lot of cute hops. It’s certainly not a traditional Viennese Waltz.
JUDGES: Carrie Ann said she was still recovering. It was like being on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, but weirder. This was his most butch performance. His technique is wonky. Len said, “It was like childbirth — terrible while it’s happening and a joy when it’s over.” Arrrrr! Bad Len is back, mateys. As if he’d know about childbirth. It had no finesse, he continued. No technique. But it was great fun and if he were at home he’d be voting for Carson. Bruno said it was Pirates of the Caribbean 5: The Revenge of the Gay Blade? But Carson lost his steps a few times. SCORES: 7, 6, 7 = 20 out of 30. Len broke out his hook when holding up his “6” paddle. Captain Hook!
Vote for Team CarsonAnna: 1-800-868-3409
4. Nancy Grace & Tristan MacManus — Paso Doble to "Flash Gordon" — Nancy combs Tristan’s chest hair before the dance. Sigh. He kisses her on the cheek on her HLN show. He wants her HLN personality on the dance floor. It’s about kicking ass. She’s the bull. She has more bull than him, he says. They threaten to kill each other, which is adorable. Love how she calls it the “Pasay Doblay.” He is Flash Gordon out there and she is the enemy, but he looks like he’s pushing her around and she’s just grimacing. She seemed to slip on her outfit in the end. Odd routine.
JUDGES: Len said her dancing is competent but the dance wasn’t exciting. Bruno said she needs to be a ball-breaker out there. The character is Carmen, sexy, bold. “Kick them in the balls.” Carrie Ann said they need to give Nancy more credit. She’s one of the older contestants (jab!) and she has good technique but she needs to connect to the audience more. SCORES: 7, 7, 7 = 21 out of 30.
Vote for Team MacGrace: 1-800-868-3405
5. Hope Solo & Maksim Chmerkovskiy — Foxtrot to "Toy Story" — Hope and Maks are already in his usual routine of bickering with his partners. She likes to think every detail through and he doesn’t. She’s putting her faith into Maks, though. They look so ridiculous in their costumes as Woody and Jessie. It’s cute. He’s a hot cowboy.
JUDGES: Bruno said it was so lovely. It’s nice to see Maks act nice. Carrie Ann said it made her smile the whole way through. It was refreshing to see her out there just having fun. Len said he gets frustrated. Hope could go all the way in the competition. The more she polishes in the rehearsal room the more it’ll show on the floor. He wants more commitment. They are a team. He doesn’t want all the bleeps and swearing in front of Hope. SCORES: 8, 8, 8 = 24 out of 30.
Vote for Team MakSolo: 1-800-868-3408
6. Rob Kardashian & Cheryl Burke — Paso Doble to "Superman" — Rob feels like he’s Clark Kent-ish. He’s shy, but not so much nerdy. Why does he keep pushing the shy thing? He says he’s changed his attitude on dancing. This is all he does now, he has no life outside of DWTS. Rob drags Cheryl into the middle of the dance floor at the start.
JUDGES: Carrie Ann likes the way he moves. He’s steady and has an ease of motion. He had spice and flavor. Really? Len said he didn’t mind the routine but he can’t go into raptures about it like Carrie Ann. We’re with Len on this one. Carrie Ann has Kardashian fever. Len compared Rob to a waiter handing out hors d'oeuvres. But then he said he liked the routine. OK. Bruno said it’s time to leave Smallville and take on the world. He has musicality and moves well, but he needs to get more assertive. SCORES: 8, 8, 8 = 24 out of 30.
Vote for Team CherBert: 1-800-868-3402
7. Ricki Lake & Derek Hough — Tango to "Psycho" — Derek had a hard time choreographing a Tango to the beats of this song. But Derek always figures it out. Ricki talked about quitting but … she’s been on the top of the leaderboard two weeks in a row. When she doesn’t get the steps right away she starts to panic. Love the shadows at the start of the routine. This is actually a great theme for a Tango. Love the ending, too. Some nice creative choreography going on tonight.
JUDGES: Len compared Ricki to the U.S. Mail -- she always delivers. She needs to give a bit more neck. “Top of the leaderboard, I think so.” Bruno called it a blockbuster worthy of three sequels. It was an immaculate tribute to the master of suspense. Carrie Ann put it simply: “Brilliant in the ballroom.” Yep, they are going to be top of the leaderboard for the third week in a row. Is Derek headed for a four-peat? SCORES: 10, 9, 10 = 29 out of 30.
Vote for Team DRickilous: 1-800-868-3411
8. Chaz Bono & Lacey Schwimmer — Paso Doble to "Rocky" — They need to feel like they’re in the boxing ring, Lacey says. Chaz’s weaknesses are his knees and ankles and the endurance aspect. Richard Simmons came in for … support? Cher went nuts for him in the audience. She looked great. Why wasn’t she in the front row? Did she want to hide?
JUDGES: Bruno said in the true spirit of Rocky, no matter how many knocks he takes he keeps coming back to get stronger. Carrie Ann cried again. For some reason he gets under her skin and makes her root for him. She called him magical. Cher was crying, too. Len said it wasn’t exactly a knockout performance but it was his best dance to date. SCORES: 7, 7, 7 = 21 out of 30.
Vote for Team Schwaz: 1-800-868-3412
9. J.R. Martinez & Karina Smirnoff — Foxtrot to "Pink Panther" — Karina is being very tough on J.R. because she thinks he can go all the way. J.R. doesn’t like anything about the Foxtrot. Karina brought in Nick Kosovich to show J.R. what a real Foxtrot looks like from the man’s side. This is another great theme with a cool intro. J.R. is very, very pink in that strawberry Willy Wonka suit.
JUDGES: Carrie Ann thought it was OK. The technique was all there. It fell a little flat for her. She thought she saw a lift but she wasn’t sure. They didn’t need the humor. Carrie Ann is off tonight. Len is upset at being between Carrie Ann and Bruno. Len thought J.R. had the best male dance of the night. It had just enough humor without going slapstick. He thought it was fabulous. Bruno called it subtle humor. He’s a dancer of great ability and versatility. SCORES: 8, 9, 9 = 26 out of 30.
Vote for Team Martinoff: 1-800-868-3410
You can also vote for everyone online here at ABC’s official DWTS site.