Credit: Adam Taylor/ABC Television Group © 2011 Disney Photo: DWTS Season 13, Week 4 Costumes: Nancy Grace & Tristan MacManus: Mixed

Dancing With the Stars folks say the darndest things — with or without farting. Here are our ten favorite quotes from DWTS Season 13, Week 4.

10. Len Goodman [to Rob Kardashian]: "When you were walking around it was as though you was a waiter, giving out hors d'oeuvres."
Great idea! Rob should do that.

9. Bruno Tonioli [on David Arquette’s Paso Doble]: "He was being butch and strong — like I like it!"
Note to David: Don’t do this again or he’ll think you’re flirting.

8. Anna Trebunskaya: "I look all tough but I'm really a soft wench on the inside."
Sounds like a tasty Russian pirate cookie.

7. Len [to Hope Solo]: "I get frustrated and I’ll tell you why."
Tom Bergeron: "Age?"
Tom is about to get himself thrown into Ricki and Derek’s Psycho scene.

6. Bruno [to David]: "I love the way you crack your whip, like a pumped-up masculine action hero — tight muscles in tight pants."
David, two words: restraining order.

5. Chaz Bono: "I'm glad I touched Carrie Ann. That sounds really wrong. But you all want to know where I touched her, don't you?"
No! Okay, maybe Bruno is curious.

4. Len [on Carson’s Viennese Waltz]: "It was like childbirth — terrible while it’s happening and a joy when it’s over."
Wait, isn’t Chaz the transgender contestant … Len, are you telling us something?

3. Carson: "Pirates are basically guys running around in tight pants, open shirts, looking for jewelry. Um, I think I can handle that."
Pirate Eye for the Straight Guy!

2. Tom [after the DWTS pro troupe’s opening number]: "You can never go wrong with lightsabers and spray tanning."
Point to ponder: What would Luke and Han look like in sequins and spray tans — and who would be the better dancer?

1. Tristan MacManus [to Nancy Grace]: "Keep your nipples in, don't fart and then just do good."
Mission accomplished … we hope.