Dark Shadows, Hick, God Bless America, Girl in Progress: Wetpaint Entertainment’s Sexy-Not Sexy Weekend Movie Guide, 5/11


Dark Shadows, Hick, God Bless America, Girl in Progress: Wetpaint Entertainment’s Sexy-Not Sexy Weekend Movie Guide, 5/11

What's the plan this weekend? How about a movie? Here's the scoop on three flicks opening this Friday, May 11.

Dark Shadows

Based on the '60s TV show of the same name, this twisted comedy of horror and suspense is about Barnabas Collins (Johnny Depp), a playboy cursed by a jealous witch who turns him into a vampire and buries him alive. Two hundred years later, he is freed, finding himself in 1972. Michelle Pfeiffer, Helena Bonham Carter, and Eva Green also star.
Sexy: Johnny Depp and vampires
Not sexy: Being buried alive
Verdict: Tim Burton and Johnny Depp make a great pair — check out this latest offering with a big group of friends.


A small-town teenager, Luli (Chloe Grace Moretz), escapes her alcoholic and abusive parents and hitchhikes to Vegas armed with her smarts, a pistol, and a little money. Along the way she crosses paths with Eddie (Eddie Redmayne), an unstable rebel with questionable motives, and Glenda (Blake Lively), a cocaine-snorting drifter on the run.
Sexy: Eddie Redmayne
Not sexy: 13-year-old girls growing up too fast
Verdict: The critics aren’t loving this one, but at 15, Chloe Moretz is an acting force to be reckoned with.

God Bless America

When Frank (Joel Murray) finds himself divorced, out of a job, and possibly terminally ill, he decides to take out his frustration on all that is evil in this world: reality stars and other annoying celebs. With an unlikely high-school accomplice at his side, he starts to eliminate his targets one by one, kinda like Dexter but a bit more extreme.
Sexy: Dexter
Not sexy: This guy
Verdict: If you're into super dark comedic satire, then this flick's for you.

Watch the trailer.

Girl in Progress

Single mom Grace (Eva Mendez) is too busy for her daughter, Ansiedad (Cierra Ramirez). As a result, the teen girl is determined to fast-track it to adulthood. But when things fall apart for her, mom and daughter realize they both need to start acting their ages.
Sexy: Not that kinda movie
Not sexy: Moms acting like the kids
Verdict: Can you think of a better choice for mom and daughter bonding this Mother's Day? (Actually, according to critics there are better bets.)

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05.11.2012 / 05:30 PM EDT by Maria Valiente
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