We have to admit, Game of Thrones Season 4, Episode 3 ("Breaker of Chains") wasn't the most exciting episode this show has ever had. Actually, it was one of the dullest. Still, it put a lot of pieces into place, and even a boring episode of Game of Thrones has entertaining moments.
So read on for Wetpaint Entertainment's recap of all the action, and then let us know what you guys think in the comments below.
King's Landing: The Aftermath of a Murder
We pick upright where we left off, with Cersei (Lena Headey) going out of her mind, Tyrion Lannister (Peter Dinklage) under arrest, and Sansa (Sophie Turner) on the run with Ser Dontos. Despite orders to close down the city, Dontos manages to get Sansa out. For a drunken fool, he's pretty resourceful. He takes her out to a hidden ship, where she's greeted by none other than Petyr “Littlefinger” Baelish (Aidan Gillen), who murders Dontos immediately, because he is a dick. Littlefinger, creepy as ever, lays out Sansa's situation pretty clearly: If she goes back to King's Landing, she'll be arrested for Joffrey's murder. So basically she's stuck with good ol' Petyr, just like he always wanted.
Back in the city, Margaery Tyrell (Natalie Dormer) wants to know if she's still queen. The answer, according to Lady Olenna (Diana Rigg) is kinda. More than with Renly, but not as much as if she and Joff had managed to get it on before he died. Even so, Olenna thinks Marg's "circumstances have improved markedly." She notes that their alliance with the Lannisters is still in place, and hints that there's a "next" husband for Margaery; presumably, Tommen Baratheon, Joffrey's younger brother. From a gay man to a sociopath to a literal child. Poor Margaery really does have terrible luck in the love department.
Speaking of Tommen, Tywin (Charles Dance) gives the new leader of the land a lecture on being a good king — literally over Joffrey's dead body. Which, as we see later, is not even the least respectful thing to happen around the dead king's corpse. Oh, Westeros.
So, what does Tywin think makes a good king? Not holiness. Not justice. Not even strength. It's wisdom. That's really good advice, actually, even if his main point is "Hey, kid, you should do what I say." Tywin is a terrible father, but he's damn good at politics.
Eventually Tywin and Tommen walk off, leaving Cersei with Jaime (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau). Cersei starts ranting about how Tyrion is the murderer, but Jaime isn't so sure, and he's definitely not all about Cersei's demand that he kill his brother. "Please Jaime, you have to. He was our son. Our baby boy." Your sociopathic, killer son who made the world a much worse place, but sure.
Instead of promising to kill his brother, Jaime tries to get it on with his sister. And when she says no he... Goes ahead and does it anyway. Um. It is an incredibly hard scene to watch, made all the more difficult to watch because we were busy yelling "WTF WHY IS THIS SO RAPEY!?"
Because, listen. This scene was in the books, but it was nothing like that. It was completely consensual. Psychologically twisted? Yes, of course. Jaime and Cersei's relationship always was, and there's no way having sex next to your dead son isn't twisted. But it was consensual. And we do not understand this change. What did it achieve, other than to basically erase all of the goodwill they'd built up around Jaime by making him a rapist? Ug. This deserves an article of its own. Let's just say we're not pleased.
Let's move on to pleasanter things, like Oberyn (Pedro Pascal) and Ellaria Sand (Indira Varma) having group sex. We even get some sexy man butt! Equal opportunity nudity. Thank you, show. This fun moment is interrupted by Tywin, who accuses Oberyn of having a hand in Joffrey's murder. Kinda. What he actually wants is the Martells on his side. He agrees to let Oberyn have a "meeting" with the Mountain (AKA get his revenge) if Oberyn will be a judge at Tyrion's trial and sit on the small council.
In the dungeons, Pod brings Tyrion dinner. He hasn't heard anything about Shae yet, but he can fill Tyrion in what's going on with the trial. Tyrion is allowed to call his own witnesses, and he's shocked to hear Sansa has skipped town. Oh, and Bronn isn't allowed to see him. Things are really not going his way. He wants to at least see Jaime. Pod also admits that someone tried to bribe him to testify against Tyrion, and Tyrion tells him to do what he needs to to protect himself. It's a really touching scene. Aww.
On the Road: The Way Things Are
The Hound (Rory McCann) and Arya (Maisie Williams) run into farmers, who take them in. These farmers are actually nice people. Yeah, we were shocked to find any of those in Westeros, too. They even offer The Hound a gig helping protect them... and as repayment, he beats up the head of the family and steals their money. Dude, we were just starting to like you. What happened to having a code?
Arya is outraged, but The Hound just doesn't give a damn. Those farmers weren't going to live out the winter, so they didn't need money. "I just understand the way things are," he tells her. He hints that Arya better get with the brutal program or she'll end up like the rest of her family — dead.
At the Wall: Romance Interrupted
Samwell Tarly (John Bradley) is bummed because no one believes that he killed a white walker. Imagine that. Oh, and remember Gilly? The Wildling he saved? She's still around. Sam is worried that she's gonna get raped, but she just wants him to like her. It's pretty cute, but Sam is too worried to make a move. Instead, moves her to Mole's Town, which makes her think he doesn't like her. Guys, just share your feelings.
Meanwhile, just south of the Wall, the Wildlings attack a village. Brutally. Styr tells a young boy he's going to eat his parents, and he should go tell the "crows" at the Wall. It's pretty upsetting. They made the Wildlings likable last year, but these new guys are just terrible.
At the Wall, the brothers debate if they should be bringing the mutineering brothers at Craster's Keep to justice, or focusing on shoring up Castle Black. Jon (Kit Harington) insists the answer is kill the mutineers before they let Mance know how weak the Night's Watch really is. This could lead to interesting things, but it was pretty boring on its own.
Dragonstone: A New Plan
Stannis (Stephen Dillane) has learned that Joffrey is dead, and he's more convinced than ever that Melisandre magic is real, since she did that whole burning leeches thing last season. Somehow, this makes him think that Davos's (Liam Cunningham) suggestion that they, like, need and army and stuff is bad. Dude, we're with Davos. You can't win a war on prophecy alone.
Fortunately, a reading lesson with Shireen gives Davos a bright idea: he should get money from the Iron Bank of Braavos. Sure, take out a loan. That always goes well. Just ask the American economy!
Meereen: Dany Is Still the Queen of Speeches
Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke) and co. have reached Meereen, but rather than confront her with an army, the city sends out a rider, a single champion who Dany needs to counter. Everyone offers their services, but Dany picks Daario Naharis (Michiel Huisman), because we need to make all of the other men around her jealous. Daario wins handily and like the badass he is. It's pretty cool, though not enough to make up for the rest of the episode.
Then Dany gives one of her famed speeches. Basically, I went around everywhere freeing slaves, now, if you'd just kill all of your masters for me, that would be great, thanks. Then she launches some barrels filled with broken chains. Cut to black. OK, fine. That was a pretty cool closing scene.
- "Who killed Joffrey?" is still a major question.
- Sorry Sam, but we basically do not care about Gilly at all.
- Stannis, showing a sense of humor: "They don't have enough men between them to raid a pantry."
- Littlefinger on why he killed Dontos: "Because he was a drunk and a fool and I don't trust drunk fools."
- Tywin, telling it like it is: "Your brother was not a wise king. Your brother was not a good king. If he had been, he might still be alive."
What did you think of this episode? Let us know in the comments below!