Time to take a trip over to Teen Mom baby daddy Gary Shirley's Twitter handle, a beautiful place full of bon mots like "going mushroom hunting" and "in da club I smell HIV needles."
Gary's account is basically the most entertaining thing that's happened to the internet, but in between musing about his watermelon farm and pondering the meaning of life, Gary recently served up some real talk. It looks like this MTV reality star could be making some huge changes — starting with a cross-continental move!
"Ok it looks like I'm moving to the UK!!!!!!!" Gary tweeted to his legions of followers on December 31, giving us a mild heart attack.
Is Amber Portwood’s ex really moving across the pond? We know England is great and all, but we're not sure they operate on "Gary Time" over there, nor will they appreciate his love for trucker hats.
Sure, it's possible that Gary's just joking around, but if he is moving to the Motherland, said relocation raises some serious custody issues. Let's not forget that our girl Amber was recently released from jail after serving 17 months of her five-year sentence, and girlfriend seems eager to acquire partial custody of their daughter, Leah. The four-year-old currently lives with her dad full-time, and we can't imagine that he'd leave the country without her!
Does this mean Amber and Gary will be heading to court? That remains to be seen, but there aren't enough tubs of ice cream to stave off the panic attack we're having. Don't leave us, Gary!
Are you as nervous as we are about this possible move? Let us know in the comments.