It’s official: everyone who watches Thursday’s Glee Season 4, Episode 4: “The Break-Up” is going to end the night in tears. We’d guessed as much, based off all the spoilers and teasers we’ve read, but now we’ve actually seen the episode. And we can solidly confirm that our eyes did fill with tears multiple times throughout the evening.
So what can you expect from this game-changing episode? We won’t spoil the ending by giving anything huge away, but we will give a few hints about what’s about to go down. People end up in bed together. Flowers are bought. Kisses are exchanged. But don’t be fooled: this episode definitely isn’t called “The Break-Up” for nothing.
1. In addition to singing that romantic version of “Teenage Dream” we’ve already seen previews for Blaine (Darren Criss) surprises his boyfriend, Kurt (Chris Colfer), with a giant bouquet of roses not once, but twice during the episode.
2. Brittana, Klaine, Finchel, and Wemma: all four couples say “I love you” at some point during the evening. But that won’t stop at least one — and maybe more — of them from breaking up, anyway.
3. We already know that Rachel (Lea Michele) cheated on Finn (Cory Monteith) by kissing Brody (Dean Geyer). But is she the only one who cheated? A few others have been tempted. Whether or not anyone else actually acted on those feelings will soon be revealed.
4. Over the course of the episode, we will see two of Glee’s fan favorite couples in bed together. But don’t get too excited. This might not turn out to be as great of news as you think it will.
5. One character makes a shocking statement. Almost immediately, another character exclaims, “I kind of feel like I’m going to die.”
6. Brittany (Heather Morris) crying is just about the saddest thing we have ever seen in our entire lives.
7. Jake (Jacob Artist) asks Marley (Melissa Benoist) to go to BreadStiX with him. Unfortunately, Kitty (Becca Tobin) is also going to be there. And the entire experience basically ends in total disaster.
8. Finn is no longer in the army, and we could make a very strong case that it is entirely Rachel’s fault. That said, Miss Berry herself did nothing to make him leave.
9. Finn Hudson is looking fine these days. Did he always used to be this attractive, or is it more of a recent development? Either way, no complaints here.
10. Remember that Season 2 scene that shows Kurt and Blaine running down the Dalton hallway hand-in-hand? We literally burst into tears when Glee flashed back to it for a second. At that moment, could you ever have pictured Klaine’s current situation unfolding in NYC? So many things have changed since then. So many things.
In all honestly, this entire episode is just a bit too much to take. It’s emotional. It’s heartwarming. Then it’s heartbreaking. But more than anything: It’s real. Relationships get tough after high school. Some might survive, but others most certainly will not.
In any case, what we need more than anything else right now is to totally drown our sorrows in chocolate. And we need to drown them now. Somebody pass us that tub of double fudge mocha ice cream, stat.
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