As handsome as Will Schuester (Matthew Morrison) is, we typically don’t spend a lot of time thinking about his skill in the bedroom. But clearly his longtime frenemy Sue Sylvester (Jane Lynch) does! In a previously unaired clip from Glee’s Season 4 premiere, the Cheerios coach paints a truly vivid picture with words when describing Schue’s, um, extracurricular activities.
“There he is, my good friend Will Schuester,” Sue begins, cheery enough that we know something’s amiss, “looking all tan and rested and like he finally got his knob polished. There’s no mistaking that healthful glow of a man no longer aching from a set of ice blue clackers.”
That’s quite the image Sue conjures up, and she’s not done yet: “You know, I do hope you were able to avoid cracking your fiancee’s fragile pelvis with the sheer vigor of your lovemaking.”
Despite the delicate topic of conversation, Will and Sue easily transition into comparing tryout stats for their respective teams. Will’s thrilled to have 28 students auditioning for glee club while Sue has “900 prospective Cheerios waiting to try out in a line that wraps around the building eight times.”
Really? Of course not. This is Sue, after all, and she owns up that it “turns out most of them are homeless people and it was a breadline.” Classic Sylvester.
The entire scene, which includes additional Will and Sue banter, is available on the Glee Season 4 DVD, which came out on October 1.