Welcome to Glee, Demi Lovato! After this week’s Season 5, Episode 2: “Tina in the Sky with Diamonds,” we’re — shield your eyes, Brittana fans — all about Team Dantana! It’s time for the recap, so grab a yeast-filled bagel, photoshop your face onto Olivia Munn’s body, and beware of falling buckets.
Love Is in the Diner
Right now, all we really want to talk about is our new favorite couple. So here goes: After nabbing that hilarious yeast infection cream commercial (infection-free people love giant bubbles, right?), Santana instantly falls for fellow diner worker Dani. Okay, so we’re not sure how many diners you’ve been to, but we have never seen this many photogenic people working at the same late-night eatery ever.
Dani — who left home with a (guitar) pick and a whole lot of pluck — watches the sunrise with Santana, and then pecks her on the lips. Seriously, that was ridiculously cute. And their duet on “Here Comes the Sun” was awesome.
But does this relationship come a little too easily? Most of our favorite Glee couples arise from one of the people really having to fight for the other — and Santana is often at her best when she has to put her all into something. So while there’s nothing wrong with a (gasp!) healthy relationship, we just hope Santana isn’t completely devoid of snark when she’s around Dani.
Infected with Love
Other stuff happened, too, but we don’t blame you if you’re too woozy from that Dantana kiss to remember anything else. Dantana sorta stole the new couple spotlight, but we’re also loving Sam and Penny (Samny?). We’re trying to ignore that it’s a little creepy for Sam to start dating someone in college (what is this, Pretty Little Liars?), and the whole “sexy nurse” storyline is a little porn-tastic.
Still, the fact that Penny is so bumbling makes them really cute together, and the age difference could be a lot worse (*cough* Puck and Shelby). Let’s just hope that Chord can finally have a romance that doesn’t get tossed aside a week later, Samcedes-style. By the way, is it just us, or did Chord’s Denzel impression improbably end up being his best one yet? Come correct, indeed.
We were honestly in tears when — just after the gang’s adorable pinkie swear to stay in NYC for two years (pinkie swears are legally binding, right?) — Rachel gets cast as Fanny in Funny Girl. Yes yes yes yes! Grab a fork, Rachel — you deserve that cake, and then some, since you’re clearly unstoppable. And by the way, Unstoppable is the also name of a Denzel movie, in case you love puns like we do.
We can imagine that it’s hard for Glee to find a way to make prom seem compelling year after year, since we all know that prom in real life is usually kind of whatever. But we loved seeing Tina win prom queen and then bounce back from her Carrie-esque humiliation (et tu, Dottie?). It’s all thanks to the poofy pink dress that Kitty loans her, which kind of looks like it’s out of this season’s Glinda the Good Witch Collection catalog, but that’s okay.
And should somebody have called an ambulance for Stoner Brett? We’re guessing that the poor guy doesn’t have too many brain cells to spare. Please give us a moment while we hum a somber version of the Stoner Brett classic, "Busters Get Popped."
And should somebody have called an ambulance for Stoner Brett? We’re guessing that the poor guy doesn’t have too many brain cells to spare. Speaking of the slushie-bucket prank: Yes, Sue and Roz still have great lines (no, you’re top-notch entertainment, Roz). But are we really to believe that Sue wants to help the glee club by getting Quinn... no, Kitty… sorry, Bree to torture them? Like, does that make sense?
Our Favorite Scene of the Night
First of all, we have trouble choosing which was our favorite Beatles tribute episode between last week’s and this week’s, although it’s hard for any episode to complete with last week’s Klaine-gagement (despite what any Glee-marriage naysayers might say!). Still, tonight’s episode was pretty much stellar. Demi Lovato is an excellent addition to the show, and she appears to bring warmth and wit. Santana's a lucky gal!
So our “Favorite Scene of the Night” Award goes to Santana and Dani’s duet and kiss. We’re not sure where these two are headed, or whether they’ll really supplant Brittana in our hearts, but we’re willing to let them try. And the runner-up scene is the pinkie swear, with third place going to Tina accepting the prom queen title and showing courage under fire. (See what we did there? Because Courage Under Fire is another Denzel movie? Okay, fine, we’ll stop.)
And so now our hearts are heavy as we prepare for what is sure to be a devastating Cory Monteith tribute episode next week. But we definitely have faith that this will be a fitting send-off for an amazing actor and beloved human being. Suddenly, we have an urge to eat away our feelings. Did you save us any cake, Rachel?