Ranking: 9 (out of 9)
Ranking two weeks ago: 5 (out of 8)
The good: He's out of New Directions, which means he doesn't have to listen to Brittany's insane comments anymore. That's a good thing, right? We just assume that even the slightest exposure to Brittany automatically drops your IQ score dramatically.
The bad: Uh... is it just us, or is the guy kind of a dick? Just checkin'.
The competition: If you're going to egg the competition, as Vocal Adrenaline does, you better be prepared to back it up vocally once Regionals rolls around next week!
Last week's ranking: 5 (out of 7)
The good: Not much to choose from here. Even her supposed kiss-off song to Jesse and Vocal Adrenaline — "Give Up the Funk (Tear the Roof Off the Sucker)" — felt awkward and lackluster. Looks like someone should stick to torch songs from now on!
The bad: She may have been covered in eggs by the guy she used to love, but at least it could have been worse. Actually... no, it couldn't have been much worse.
The competition: Looks like Regionals holds even higher stakes for Rachel and her former flame Jesse!
Ranking two weeks ago: 7
The good: She gets compared to Michael Jordan after winning a trophy that's nearly as tall as he is.
The bad: Overall, though, this was a rough week for our scary friend. She finally opens up her heart to love, and what happens? She is left to sit alone by herself at a fancy restaurant. See, people — this is why it's better to just never leave the house!
The competition: Sue is bound to turn her interaction with frenemy Olivia Newton-John next week into some kind of competition, and we can't wait to witness it!
Last week's ranking: N/A
The good: If we didn't know any better, we'd have to ask for ID to verify that this is indeed the same Terri whom we've known all along. Because we're a little skeptical! We actually see her share a tender moment with Will — telling him that she still has fond memories of him at 16 — and then she gives jobs to Finn and Puck and helps Finn with his song choice. Who knew there was more to her than faking pregnancies and getting high school kids addicted to prescription drugs?! (Okay, so maybe the old Terri would be more fun at a party, but still...)
The bad: Looks like she's lost Will forever and is stuck at that job helping customers like Sandy Ryerson. And spending time with someone like Sandy is not a fate we would wish on anyone — not even a pregnancy faker!
The competition: Emma, who — even when missing from the episode — still has a better shot at Will!
Ranking three weeks ago: 9 (out of 10)
The good: Until this week, Quinn and her confidence seemed to be forever separated, kinda like Nemo and his fish family. But they finally got reunited as Quinn volunteered to belt some James Brown. Plus, it looks like she finally has a place to stay once the baby comes, courtesy of Mercedes. So Puck had to house Pregnant-And-Irritable Quinn, but he won't get to live with the new, Baby-Free-And-Hot-As-Ever Quinn? Sorry, buddy!
The bad: That song with those weird pregnant dancers was certainly polarizing. What say we move on, yes?
The competition: Rachel, but Rachel's dealing with her own issues, too
Last week's ranking: 2
The good: It was nice to see Schuester get down with his bad self this week without resorting to the dreaded white rapping that he loves so much. But don't worry — we would get some white rapping soon enough, courtesy of Puck and Finn!
The bad: You know how people sometimes say that someone doesn't know his own strength? It turns out Schue doesn't quite appreciate the power of his own sultriness, as he turns Sue into McKinley's own Jessica Simpson, right after Jessica was dumped by any number of handsome musicians of her own. And unlike Jessica, Sue actually wins things, and then decides to throw it in Will's face — but a beautiful face at that.
The competition: Shelby, who showed some compassion by not pushing for expulsion for Finn and Puck. Plus, since when does Figgins have such a crush on Shelby?!
Last week's ranking: 6
The good: He wasn't around much this week, but we'll still give him a pretty high standing for winning Nationals for the Cheerios with that extended Celine Dion medley all in French. If only they would have showed us a clip of it!
The bad: He helps Sue win yet another trophy, and he doesn't expect us to use the word "traitor"? Sorry, Kurt — we're just calling it as we see it!
The competition: Finn and Puck, who are back and better than ever!
Ranking three weeks ago: 3
The good: The burgeoning Quinn/Mercedes sisterhood is a story line that we can definitely get behind, especially as Quinn's pregnancy nears — with her family MIA of late, we're starting to worry that there won't be many people in the waiting room at the hospital, passing out cigars. This is starting to seem like the least popular birth of a girl since all those girls that Henry 8th's wives delivered. Plus, it might not have been "funk" per se, but let's not discount her noteworthy performance in "Good Vibrations." Performances like Mercedes' make us feel that maybe early '90s rap songs weren't as regrettable as we remember — and that's hard to do!
The bad: Mercedes came thisclose to earning her first number one slot on this list. But when the boys are back in town, who are we to deny them?
The competition: Rachel, who's way down at the bottom of this list
Last week's ranking: Puck — 1; Finn — 3
The good: What can we say? Sometime two people are destined to be together — say, Brad and Angelina, for example — and no matter how much we like Jen (sorry, Quinn), we want to see these two to end up side-by-side.
The bad: The only thing we can complain about is that their version of "Loser" should have been longer! Anything that gives Howard Bamboo more chances to join in on the fun (as when he got to say "Cut it!") are fine by us!
The competition: Let's just say that, when Puck and Finn put their minds to something, we're glad to not be in Vocal Adrenaline's shoes — or their auto mechanics'! That's a lot of tires to replace!