Are we in Bethesda yet? You oughta know that it’s time for a Fourth of July edition of The Glee Project, in which Charlie and Aylin are dunzo; hottie Blake performs for Ryan for the first time ever; and apparently no one know Jessie J’s “Price Tag” from Adam. Speaking of which, we’re wishing that we never had to know Scott Campbell. (A note to Charlie: You don’t have to become a method actor for a music video shoot. You’re not Marlon Brando.)
This week’s episode, “Adaptability,” started out with Aylin and Charlie deciding that they should just be friends — or rather, Aylin deciding it and Charlie basically going along with it. Maybe they decided to be more independent in honor of Independence Day? (We had no idea they were so patriotic!)
The homework assignment is Alanis Morissette’s angry-chick classic “You Oughta Know,” and in keeping with the episode’s title, the contestants aren’t able to choose their own parts this week. Frankly, we’re bummed out about this, since one of the highlights of each episode is seeing the contestants practically start World War III (or is that "World War Glee"?) when they can't sing the lyric they want.
Kevin McHale (Artie) drops by to talk about “rolling” with the punches (wordplay!) and informs the contestants that they’ll be each singing the entire song alone. Gulp. Shanna isn’t exactly thrilled about this, since she says she doesn’t know the words to the song. Come to think of it, we don’t really know the lyrics all that well either, except for the fact that the f-word is in there somewhere.
They then each sing the song — although the show has omitted a certain lyric about what Alanis apparently does to guys in a movie theater. (Let’s just say that if movie theater owners aren’t thrilled about people texting during a movie, then we’re thinking that they definitely don’t want people to be doing what Alanis does.)
Kevin praises Ali and Shanna, but it’s Aylin who wins the challenge. And Shanna is right — she doesn’t know the lyrics to that song. Apparently, Shanna has never blasted that song at full volume while screaming the words as she’s getting over a breakup. (Not that we’ve done that before. Nope, definitely never done that.)
And just in case you forgot that the theme is adaptability, there’s yet another thing to adapt to. It’s time to announce what the group number will be - except that it isn’t announced, and the contestants won’t have a chance to prepare the song ahead of time. It isn’t until they get to the recording session that Nikki tells them they’ll be singing Jessie J’s “Price Tag” — which neither Blake nor Shanna have ever heard of. Somewhere, Jessie J just fired her publicity team.
But not knowing the song doesn’t seem to hurt Shanna one bit, and she knocks it out of the park. In fact, so do most of the contestants — including Michael and Aylin — as not overthinking their parts seems to help. However, this is not the case for Abraham, as Nikki informs him that he’s sounding pitchy and his timing is off. Ali is also struggling a bit in the studio.
It’s now time for the video shoot, about a battle between rich and poor kids. Somehow, Charlie gets a
terrible unique idea to transform into a whole new character named Scott Campbell, who makes comments about caviar. Let’s just say that Aylin is probably glad that she kicked Charlie to the curb when she did.
The mentors aren’t loving that Charlie is making the shoot all about himself, and they also aren’t loving Mario’s acting, as the director has to keep giving Mario notes. Meanwhile, Zach comes up with some impromptu choreography that seems relatively simple, but this makes Blake’s head look like it’s on the verge of exploding. Some people just need to stand still and look pretty, and for today, that appears to describe Blake rather well.
It’s now time for feedback on the week. Aylin is named the standout performer, but six people will have to sing in front of Ryan Murphy this week, instead of the usual three. The unlucky six are Blake and Nellie, Ali and Abraham, and Mario and Charlie, who will all be performing duets.
First up is Blake and Nellie's hair-metal ballad “Waiting for a Girl Like You,” which Ryan refers to as an “opera” and tells the two of them to step it up. However, Ryan does admit that Blake has really got something. Just to clarify: Ryan Muphy telling you that you've "really got something"? That's good. But a doctor telling you that you've "really got something"? That's bad.
Next, Ali and Abraham perform Katy Perry’s “Last Friday Night” — perhaps in honor of the new Katy Perry movie that comes out today? The two of them have trouble with the words, which is kinda ridiculous, considering that the song doesn’t seem to be that challenging, not to mention that it was performed on Glee earlier this season. Ryan tells Ali that she is Dolly Parton-esque, and that he had no idea that she was so funny.
However, all we were thinking during this performance was, “How is it possible to perform a Katy Perry song on the night before the 4th of July and not choose Firework?? That’s just un-American!”
Then, Mario and Charlie perform “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me.” Ryan compliments them on how sweet they are to each other as they perform, so it’s for the best that Ryan didn’t have to watch them constantly bicker as they rehearsed the song. But we were impressed with that vest that Mario was wearing. Way to channel your inner Schue, Mario!
Then, Ryan narrows down the three worst performances, and Abraham, Mario, and Charlie all end up in the bottom three. Ryan says that Abraham gave the night’s worst performance, whereas Mario’s acting is suspect, and Charlie is difficult to work with. But in the end, it was Mario — and not Abraham — who was given the boot!
So who did we like this week? Well, we were thrilled to see Michael bounce back in a major way, since we’re convinced that he has talent and can be a real contender on the show. Plus, Blake will never be referred to as the next Usher (translation: Blake can’t dance), but it was clear to Ryan (and us) that he’s memorable — and have we mentioned that he’s not bad to look at? Because he's not.
Aylin is getting better and better, and Ali seems like she’d be a blast to hang out with. Meanwhile, Abraham seems to be on super-thin ice, and we’re not really how we feel about Charlie. Saying that Charlie is difficult is like saying that hot dogs are tasty — it’s an understatment. (What can we say? It’s the Fourth of July, so we’ve got hot dogs on the brain.)
So we can’t wait for next week’s episode (Jane Lynch!), but in the meantime, we hope that everyone has an amazing Fourth of July. Have fun today, whether you decide to barbecue or see a movie. But if you do decide to see a movie, just make sure that you don’t do what Alanis does during a movie, or you could end up banned for life from the theater. Just sayin’.