Too much good stuff. Not just the slogan for AMPMs nationwide. (What? We can’t be the only ones who knew that.) No, no — this time it can only describe next week’s SAM-tastic promo for Season 3, Episode 8, “Hold On to Sixteen,” in which the glee clubs go to Sectionals (and Chord Overstreet makes a strip-roarious Season 3 debut — but we’ll get to that in a second).
Let’s analyze the goods, shall we?
Scene 1: Buh-bye traditional Sectionals dresses
Hello formal menswear! Usually the glee club gals are all decked out in poofy dresses for their Sectionals showing. But this year, the ladies and gentleman of New Directions go for a very GQ approach for their performance garb (unlike The Troubletones). Could a bold (and better?) fashion statement impress the judges and push them closer to a win?
Scene 2: The Troubletones enjoy another glee club's Sectionals performance
And, naturally, we assume that its the performance of their New Directions pals that’s got them grooving, what with all the Santana-supporting bringing them together in this week’s “I Kissed a Girl.” Nice to think that they’re going into this big day with positive vibes. But then...
Scene 3: Finn vs. Blaine!
Finn’s been hatin’ on Blaine since he traded in his Warblers blazer for a seat next to Kurt in the New Directions choir room, and it hasn’t gone unnoticed. A sweaty Blaine... sorry we got distracted. Ahem, a sweaty Blaine confronts Finn in the school’s weight room, and we, too, want to know what exactly about our beloved Blaine is getting Finn’s boxers all in a bunch.
Scene 4: Quinn’s got (another) plan
Is it to win Sectionals, as the editing of the promo leads us to believe? Given Quinn’s recent history, we find it hard to believe that her attitude-soaked response to the not-yet determined question is just that innocent. And now that she’s given up on A) stealing her old baby and B) making a new one... we’re dying to know what exactly is this new “plan.”
Scene 5: Emma looks freaked out...
While Will smiles on. Why so extremely different reactions to what we assume to be a Sectionals performance? The only thing we can think of is that New Directions has a performance surprise up its sleeve that Mr. Schue already knew about. Or maybe Emma is thinking about a pre-Sectionals romp that she and Will (finally) had? It’s possible!
Sam White Chocolate Returns to Lima!
If you skipped to this part of the analysis, we totally don’t blame you. We’re not the only ones totally taken aback by the fact that Finn and Rachel find Sam... stripping! And under the name “White Chocolate,” no less! Is Chord Overstreet’s revived character the secret weapon the Fox voiceover guy is talking about? Well we’re not quite sure Sam’s vocals have ever been Sectionals Winning-worthy, but maybe his new gig will somehow be incorporated in their Sectionals performance! (That would surely explain Scene 5.)
Scene 6b: Rachel’s got a sweet tooth...
And White Chocolate is what she’s craving. Her jaw-to-the-ground reaction of a shirtless and gyrating Sam is priceless, and after the post-election drama of this week’s ep, homegirl deserves to loosen up and have a good time, right? Finn, we suggest you get that girl some Washingtons, stat.
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