Ch-ch-changes! Glee is going through a major growth spurt, as reigning queen Rachel Berry has now relocated to New York City (with Kurt in tow) — and McKinley’s got a new sweetheart wandering its halls: Marley (Melissa Benoist), who also happens to be in love with Jake (Jacob Artist). We analyzed all 31 seconds of the Episode 2 promo to figure out what exactly is happening next week in Glee Season 4, Episode 2: “Britney 2.0”:
0:05 — Rachel wrings her hands in the middle of the ballet studio
Toto, we’re not in Lima anymore.
0:06 — Cassandra July (Kate Hudson) to Rachel: “You don’t have enough sex appeal.”
Maybe get rid of those headbands?
0:09 — Kurt and Rachel have dinner by candlelight on the floor of their new apartment
All of that overexposed brick makes us think they moved to Brooklyn. Or the set of Coyote Ugly.
0:12 — Kurt finds out the name of Rachel’s dance teacher. “AKA Crazy July, AKA the biggest trainwreck in Broadway history?”
Kurt knows a true drama queen when he sees them.
0: 13 — Flash to: Kate Hudson wielding a bat
THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN GWYNETH PALTROW, YOU GUYS.
0:15 — Brittany (Heather Morris): “It’s Britney, bitch”
Heather Morris was born to dance the hell out of a Britney Spears song. Anyone else think this might be her performance of “Hold It Against Me”?
0:18 — Rachel is wearing a bodysuit, letting Brody grind into her
To quote Britney Spears: “Not a girl, not yet a woman.”
0:20 — Mr. Schue and Emma!
Something makes us think the producers are over this storyline?