Glee is finally back; take a moment to go crazy! (Okay, we didn’t think you were going to go that crazy. Get a hold of yourself, for goodness sake.) We finally got a new episode after the month-long hiatus, and all we can say is that we feel the same way about the episode that we do about potato chips — one is not enough! We want the whole bag right now!
At least it’s a fun episode, in which we see Santana (Naya Rivera) stand up for Klaine; Mike (Harry Shum Jr.) put the moves on a mop; Mercedes (Amber Riley) go off the diva deep end; and Brittany (Heather Morris) appear to be a crazy cat lady-in-training.
The episode kicks off with Schue (Matthew Morrison) informing the kids that Sue (Jane Lynch) has absconded with their club’s money, and now they can’t afford Nationals. Uh, haven’t we seen the “how are they ever going to get enough money” plot used on this show before? These poor kids have more budget issues than Obama.
At least glee isn’t the only club that’s suffering. Artie (Kevin McHale), Tina (Jenna Ushkowitz), Mike, and Brittany have all joined the Brainiacs, the school’s academic decathlon team, and they need money to make it to a televised match in Detroit. Will’s not-at-all-sensible solution? Selling taffy. (Good luck with that, Will. We’ll be over here in the real world.)
Needless to say, Sue wouldn’t shed too many tears if the team were to miss out on Nationals, so she assembles some like-minded individuals — including Terri Schuester (Jessalyn Gilsig), Sandy Ryerson (Stephen Tobolowsky), and Vocal Adrenaline coach Dustin Goolsby (Cheyenne Jackson) — to thwart glee’s efforts. It’s been a while since there have been this many angry people together in one room, outside of a Marilyn Manson fan club meeting.
Holly thinks Will’s taffy idea sucks — not that you need an MBA from Wharton to reach that conclusion — so she encourages him to organize a benefit concert, with New Directions singing songs by neglected artists. But things between the two lovebirds get rocky when Holly (Gwyneth Paltrow) sees Schue comforting Emma (Jayma Mays) — now that Carl (John Stamos) wants an annulment — and Schue sees Dustin Goolsby (aka Sgt. Handsome) hitting on Holly with a hilarious line about Will eating Big Macs layer by layer. (Is it just us, or is the Bluetooth-sporting Dustin a lot of fun as a new villain?)
The long-absent Sunshine Corazon (Charice) is also finally back, promising to help New Directions by performing at the benefit and bringing her Twitter followers with her. She wins glee over with a show-stopping rehearsal of “All By Myself,” which even makes Puck look like he’s seen the rapture.
The addition of Sunshine to the lineup means that Mercedes gets a less-than-desirable slot, until Lauren (who else?) tells her not to take guff from Rachel (Lea Michele), and even makes herself Mercedes’s manager. Lauren and Mercedes then make demands for the night of the performance that even Axl Rose would refer to as eccentric.
As the world’s cutest couple — aka Kurt (Chris Colfer) and Blaine (Darren Criss) — walk the halls before the benefit, Karofsky (Max Adler) threatens them and gets in a shoving match with Blaine. That is, until Santana stands up for them. Who knew she had it in her?
It’s time for the performances, but Sunshine has bailed, and about as many people are in the audience as there would be at a rally to ban ice cream from stores. To make matters worse, most of the few people in the audience are in cahoots with Sandy Ryerson to heckle, leaving Tina — who attempts to perform Lykke Li’s “I Follow Rivers” — in tears. Will forces the kids to keep singing, and then Holly steps in, teaching the hecklers that anonymous hatred still hurts, even if it is hilarious.
Another problem is Mercedes, who’s nowhere to be found. Rachel tracks her down in her car and convinces her to prove that she deserves the closing slot. Sure enough, Mercedes gets onstage and kills it with Aretha’s “Ain’t No Way,” and Rachel acknowledges that it’s an impossible act to follow.
Holly is thrilled that her benefit idea ended up a success, but she then breaks the news to Will that she’s taking a job in Cleveland — because she’s aware that Emma and Will both still have feelings for each other. (The moral? Love hurts.) Then crazy Sandy Ryerson saves the day, deciding to fund the entire trip to Nationals. Sure, he’s using drug money, but it’s the thought that counts, right?
So the first episode back is a fun one, and the remaining five episodes promise to be even better! Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re getting a bit hungry. Anyone want a few layers of our Big Mac? (Dibs on the special sauce.)
Get ready for next week’s “Born This Way”:
Can’t get enough Gleetastic goodness? “Like” us on Facebook!