Credit: The CW

YOU GUYS! How funny was Gossip Girl Season 6, Episode 9: "The Revengers"? Right? No? Yeah, not that funny. But seriously, between the near-deaths and the kidnapping debacles and the actual death, we were hanging on waiting for the hilarity to hit. Raise your glass to the near-worthy efforts of your favorite characters and remember that you have to laugh twice as hard at everything cuz it’s all about to be over.

10. Dear Gossip Girl writers...
Blair (Leighton Meester): “I retract everything civil I just said: this is all your fault.”

9. Can someone say Vajazzler?
Dan (Penn Badgley): “Well, now I’ll never be able to set foot in the guest bath without thinking of your Geor-gina.

8. If anything’s going to redeem Nate in our books, it’s a well-timed Homeland reference.
Nate (Chace Crawford): “I don’t know how Claire Danes does this — spying hurts my head”

7. #Firstworldproblems
Blair: “Yes, this is Blair Waldorf. Apparently my town car has been absconded by a ruthless billionaire. So, if you’d send another — preferably with a less villainous driver”

6. That class conflicted with our hangovers, too.
Sage (Sofia Black-D’Elia): “Am I the only one who didn’t study Byzantine warfare?”

5. It’s just simple logic.
Georgina (Michelle Trachtenberg): “You can’t have an evil cabal without the queen of con”

4. Role models really are an important part of a young boy’s life.
Bart Bass: “You know, I’ve always felt like Scrooge was unfairly maligned.”

3. We said the same thing to our boyfriends.
Georgina (to Sage): “Phone stealing, seriously? That’s the training bra of treachery”

2. They’re actresses too — they just never get called to the set (RIP Mitch Hedberg)
Blair: “Reinvention is for starlets from trailer parks who want to be you.”

1. Okay, fine. We love you, Sage. Love love love.
Sage: “You literally just tossed a cookie. I go to Constance. I know an eating disorder when I see one.”

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