As the season wears on, it’s looking less and less likely that Jenny will return. On the one hand, we’re more or less cool with that — watching a miserable Taylor Momsen sulk her way through the show made us feel like we were complicit in child slavery — but sometimes we do miss the Pantsless One. We’ve come up with some scenarios in which the littlest, meanest Humphrey could return to Manhattan.

Credit: Hector Vallenilla/PacificCoastNews.com Photo: Taylor Momsen Yawns on Set on October 10, 2008

1. College. Seriously, if she really wants to be a fashion designer, NYC is the place to be.

2. For Eric (Connor Paolo). Poor Little E could use a friend — badly — and Jenny’s the only one he’s got. His biggest problem this year has been Damien (Kevin Zegers), and Little J was much better at handling the dastardly drug dealer’s machinations than Eric. We’re guessing Eric doesn’t know how to make a jacket out of roofies.

3. She finds out Nate (Chace Crawford) is dating Raina (Tika Sumpter) and comes back to do something horrible to her, as she does to all Nate’s girlfriends.

4. In keeping with Humphrey-Upper East Side relations, she finds out about Dan (Penn Badgley) and Blair’s (Leighton Meester) kiss and comes back to punch Blair in the face.

5. She joins a band! They have an alt-pop sound, they sing about death a lot, and a whole episode centers around one of their concerts. Seriously, this is the only way she’ll come back.

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GG writers, take note of our other brilliant ideas:
5 Inappropriate Guys Serena Could Go After Next
Vanessa Must Go! 5 Ways to Kick Her Off