Applause to the Gossip Girl writers: Snappy lines are the main reason we tune in each week! Enjoy our picks for the ten snarkiest quotes froom “It-Girl Happened One Night.”
10. Blair’s a Chanel ghost
Serena: Don’t tell me you’re leaving already. Between classes at Columbia and your job at W, the only proof I have that you still exist is the faint trace of Chanel in the morning.
9. Maybe they were close.
Blair: What about you and Ben? It must be very special for him, spending Valentine’s Day with someone other than his celly.
8. That wouldn’t really be good for the axe.
The Captain: Whatever Thorpe told you is a lie.
Chuck: I think I’ll take advice from someone not interested in grinding an axe across my knuckles, thank you.
7. Don’t do the crime, you still might do the time.
Dan: How’s the job search going?
Ben: The need to check the “have you ever committed a felony” box kind of limits my options.
6. Guess that MIchael Douglas cameo isn’t happening
The Captain: Wall Street didn’t need a sequel in the theater or in my life.
5. The lady doth protest too much.
Blair: Last year, Chuck and I honored Valentines Day by staging our very own bacchanal. And no, there were no goats, if that’s the look that just fluttered across your face.
4. Blair’s so ambitious her plans are three years shorter
Blair: I’m so sorry, S. But if I can turn this into a permanent job, it’ll knock six months off my two-year plan.
3. Dan knows Blair too well
Dan: Waldorf. Where’s the new Epperly?
Blair: You’re looking at her.
Dan: Oh God. What’d you do to her?
2. Chuck and Raina’s tender romance
Raina: At first it was purely for the sex.
Serena: That’s Chuck.
Raina: No, I meant me.
1. Dan and Blair flirt shamelessly
Dan: My only contact at Conde Nast has been replaced by a stapler stealer.
Blair: And I will staple whatever’s in your sweaty hands to the front of your jeans if you don’t leave this instant.