Applause to the Gossip Girl writers: Snappy lines are the main reason we tune in each week, and Season 5, Episode 6’s “I Am Number Nine” did not disappoint. Keep the Bassness coming!

 

Credit: Thelonius/Splash News Photo: Blair Waldorf is Lovely in Lemon Prints

10. Chuck's great at the self diagnosis

Dr. Eliza: So what do you think the dream is about?

Chuck (Ed Westwick): My father's tragic death. My mother's secret life. Or perhaps my chronic oral fixation.

 

9. Boot camp a la Blair

(Blair and Dorota look over a bulletin board of potential bridesmaids) 

Dorota: So many minions. How will you ever decide?

Blair (Leighton Meester): Tryouts begin after breakfast.

 

8. Sure it did...

Dan (Penn Badgley): (looking at the New York Times bestseller list) Number nine. Inside, by Daniel Humphrey. Where did Lincoln Hawk's first single debut at?
Rufus: Eight.

 

7. Not so much manipulating as browbeating...

Blair: Don't you just adore us?

Louis (Hugo Becker): Why do I feel like there's a request coming?

Blair: Not a request. A special dispensation.

Louis: For what?

Dorota: Scheming and manipulating.

Blair: Who do you work for?

 

6. Funny, that's what Rumsfeld said.

Blair: All I’d be doing is spending the day with my minions. Maybe some light waterboarding involved. But I've been so good for so long.

 

Credit: Giovanni Rufino/The CW 2011 The CW Network Photo: Diana Payne in Gossip Girl Season 5, Episode 6: “I Am Number Nine”

5. Penelope, we've missed you.

Blair: Where's Nelly Yuki?

Penelope: Yale. Where she got in and you didn't. Plus she hates you, remember?

 

4. Dan, don't you dare bash Newsies.

Jane: Now, another thought that occurred was to Glee this up. You know, music. Or covers.

Dan: OK, stop. What's going on? I thought we were talking about turning my book into an important independent film.

Jane: Dan, relax, we’re just talking.

Dan: About turning my book into Newsies!

 

3. We would not put something like that past her! 

Diana: I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone for coming. It means so much to me that if a bomb went off right now, New York media would be over.

 

2. And probably go on lots of walks!

Jane: Serena, look, I found Dan. Did you already tell him we got Sorkin to write the movie?

Dan: What? No. That's incredible.

Jane: I know. Now your character will talk even faster than you do.

 

1. Don’t worry, C. We’re sure you’ll do fine!

Charlie: I'm starting to feel like I'm not Nate's type.

Penelope: Hello, Nate doesn't have a type. He's like Derek Jeter.

 

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