Vanessa’s had a good run, but maybe it’s time for her to take her put-upon sighs and her tribal necklaces and get lost. Here are a few suggestions on how to show her the door.
1. Falls down a mine shaft: Why mess around with anything subtler? V isn’t exactly subtle herself. Picture it: She’s walking down the street, being judgmental — when whoops! She falls down a deep, dark mine shaft. True, those are in short supply in New York, but Blair would likely be willing to invest in the construction of one for such a good cause.
2. Gets carried away on the wings of success: Remember that time Vanessa had a summer internship in Haiti? We’re sure she did a great job. They probably want to offer her a prestigious full-time gig. In Haiti. Forever.
3. Fatal print overdose: Frankly, it’s surprising she hasn’t already succumbed to the effects of wearing at least three different eye-gouging fabric prints at any given time. The FDA would probably recommend against that.
4.Global warming: Most New Yorkers have seen those scary Times simulations in which parts of the city would be underwater if the oceans rise. Including most of Brooklyn. Whoops! Off to Jersey, V.
5. Runs off to Vegas to marry Rufus: Oh, you know they want each other.
Want more Gossip Girl goodness? “Like” us on Facebook! You know you love us. XOXO
Do you like Vanessa? Okay, fine:
- Steal Her Style! Jessica Szohr Looks Stellar on Set
- Our New York Fashion Week Picks for Vanessa Abrams