Credit: Giovanni Rufino/The CW 2011 The CW Network Photo: Ivy Dickens in Gossip Girl Season 5, Episode 8: “All The Pretty Sources”

Remember those halcyon days of spring 2011 ...  back when we had no idea who Charlie Rhodes was? It was a time when no one had even heard of Ivy Dickens — and little Charlie (Kaylee DeFer) seemed like nothing more than a wackadoo Single White Serena.

You remember: Back when we couldn’t figure out how anyone could be simultaneously so dorky and so conniving? Back when she was super mean to Vanessa? Those were the days. Ah, Charlvy. Now we know exactly who you are! All the mystery has gone out of our relationship.

Or has it? We have a feeling that the UES’s biggest impostor will find a way to keep us on our toes. Here’s a few things about Ivy that still bug us...

Why is she still sticking around the Upper East Side?

Duh, being a van der Woodsen is obviously awesome. You get designer dresses, an automatic ticket to the most exclusive social set in the world, and all the waffles you can eat. But half the time Ivy doesn’t even seem happy to be there — and we still don’t get why she had to dump her cute BF, Max. Maybe he’d like to be a grifter too! You never know unless you ask.

So, is she really just hanging out at the loft to milk her days of luxury for all they’re worth? Or is there some darker reason she had to leave her life behind? Maybe she is on the run from the mob! If so, she is probably in the right place. We get the feeling the mob might be a subsidiary of Bass Industries.

Where’s the real Charlie?

Credit: Giovanni Rufino/The CW 2011 The CW Network Photo: Diana Payne and Ivy Dickens in Gossip Girl Season 5, Episode 7: “The Big Sleep No More”

What was the reason for this whole elaborate scheme in the first place? We can’t help but wonder what happened to the real Charlie Rhodes. Does she really not care that her trust fund is being passed around like a joint at a party? Girl needs to be in better control of her finances! (Assuming Carol doesn’t have her locked in a closet or something, in which case we apologize for impugning her fiscal responsibility.)

Who is Ivy, really?

We know who she isn’t — Charlie Rhodes. We know she’s a struggling actress with a cutie-pie boyfriend who bakes her things. And... that’s kind of it.

What led Ivy Dickens to this desperate place? And more to the point: once the Upper East Side crew learn that Ivy’s not a true member of the One Percent, what’s to stop them from kicking her to the curb? Still so many questions left unanswered!

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