Grey's Anatomy Season 9, Episode 4: "I Saw Her Standing There" starts off with a bang … pun completely intended. Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) and Derek (Patrick Dempsey) are having passionate sex in the uber dreamy dream house, Cristina (Sandra Oh) and Dr. Parker (ugh) are having rather dull sex in his office, and Jackson (Jesse Williams) and April (Sarah Drew) are having crazy hot sex in an on-call room. Is it just us, or have our favorite doctors gotten classier over the years?

But don’t worry. These doctors aren’t all about sex. They’re also all about impossible tumors, friendship and, occasionally, very large balls. It’s a long story. Actually it’s not. There’s a patient with a rather enormous scrotum. Yep, that about covers it.

So after all the morning sex, the day begins. Cristina explores her lack of chemistry with Dr. Parker while Jackson and April spend all day trying to deny their overabundance of chemistry by claiming that every time is the “last time.” Pray all you want, April, but so long as he’s got those abs, we have a feeling there won’t be a last time.

And it turns out that Jackson isn’t the only hot lover in town. A very dapper (and equally chipper) Richard (James Pickens Jr.) enters the hospital in a suit and tie. We all know there’s only one reason for the ex-chief to look that good (and carry a spare tie in his pocket): a woman.

That’s right. The stunning Catherine Avery (Debbie Allen) is back in action. And in this chapter of the “Adventure of Catherine and Richard,” Richard gives her a surgical case of VERY swollen testicles instead of flowers. Talk about romantic. 

Oh, and don’t let us forget about the people who aren’t currently having sex. Arizona (Jessica Capshaw) is back in the hospital! And she’s working with someone called a prosthesisist. We’re not entirely sure it’s an actual doctor, but in this case, we are sure that it’s Bobby Ray (Ethan Embry)! All Sweet Home Alabama fans will know where we’re coming from with this one.

And with their introduction, Arizona starts the very slow healing process. In the beginning, she can’t look at her leg and continues to say harsh things to Callie (Sara Ramirez). Then she peeks at her leg and says harsh things to Bobby Ray. And finally, after Alex (Justin Chambers) physically catches her and then catches her up on all things peds, she faces a mirror and later invites Callie (who had been sleeping at Mark’s [Eric Dane]) to watch American Bake-Off. Leave it to reality television to help mend their marriage.

Next up: the interns. To put it simply: They’re dumb. And we’re not being judgmental of their medical abilities. OK, we are. But we are also being judgmental of their taste in men. Who would rather be watching a surgery than sitting in a class taught by McDreamy? Their lack of appreciation for his hair is startling and very worrisome.

While Derek busies himself teaching and being underappreciated, Meredith takes on an impossible tumor. And when Derek learns that Mer was “bubble wrapping” him (aka keeping her success from him in an attempt not to depress him), he has a heart-to-heart with Owen (Kevin McKidd), who can’t sleep without Cristina and is in no mood to beat around the bush. He tells Derek that he sucks at the emotional stuff. Last time things got to be too much, he grew a beard and retreated to the woods. So instead of McDreamy heading back down that path, Owen decides to do it instead. Well, not the beard part. At least not yet.

So as Owen takes over the airstream, McDreamy assures his wife that she can be “Mrs. Impossible Tumor” without him being “Mr. Impossible Tumor” and, more importantly, without him taking a bat to her engagement ring. Sometimes a girl just needs to know that a bat is out of the picture.

But the drama of Seattle doesn’t have anything on the messed-up scheming occurring in Minnesota. Apparently, Dr. Parker wants to force Mr. Feeny (aka, Cristina’s new bestie) to retire by proving that he’s behind the times. However, Cristina has a soft spot for the old man and decides to coach him through a surgery, buy him a drink (an old-fashioned, of course) and ditch her sex friend. It’s years later and Mr. Feeny is still bringing out the best in his students ...

Back to the biggest part of this episode: the case of the enormous balls. While working the case, Catherine Avery (who is having the best sex of her life) reveals all the details of her sex life to April, which makes Jackson decide to man up and have a one-on-one with Richard. And despite his best, most intimidating efforts, Jackson simply cannot out-man Richard. But it was a valiant effort and a real showdown on both of their parts … one that some might say took a lot of balls. Actually not some, but  Bailey (Chandra Wilson). Bailey said that.

Other things we learned: A giant scrotum turns Bailey into a comedian, amputation fights are harder on a marriage than financial fights, and intern Shane is definitely Derek’s biggest admirer (at least someone appreciates him, even if it’s not for his charming good looks). However, we have a feeling Shane might also end up being Derek’s next student.

Who knew that so much sex and such large balls could lead to personal growth for almost all of our favorite surgeons?

What did you guys think of the episode? Is Arizona officially on the mend? How cute are Richard and Catherine? And how much longer will Cristina be wearing Christmas-colored scrubs?

We’ll see you in two weeks when Meredith is faced with an emergency that is reminiscent of Lexie’s (Chyler Leigh) death. Somehow, that doesn’t sound nearly as sexy.

Catch the next new episode of Grey’s Anatomy on Thursday, November 8 at 9 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.

Samantha Highfill is a contributing writer to Wetpaint Entertainment. Follow her on Twitter at @samhighfill.

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