“Guys Hate Arts and Crafts!” A Man’s Review of The Bachelor 16, Episode 6
Credit: Illustration by Wetpaint Entertainment (Original Source: ABC Television Group © 2011 Disney)    

The Bachelor

“Guys Hate Arts and Crafts!” A Man’s Review of The Bachelor 16, Episode 6

When it comes to The Bachelor, both genders would clearly agree that there’s a whole lotta craziness going on. But what do guys notice about Season 16 Bachelor Ben Flajnik’s choices and actions that the rest of us might not? And would all guys act the way Ben does? We need a male perspective!

To figure out what guys think when they watch this show, we’ve asked a male to name the three things he noticed while watching this week’s Episode 6, including the one good decision Courtney made this week.

1. There was only one date that wasn’t excruciating to watch.

Guess which one!

Let’s be honest here: Courtney Robertson deciding to take off her bathing suit top on the group date was awesome, but where’s Blakeley Shea when we really need her?

And speaking of Courtney, I was beyond depressed to say goodbye to her bestie Casey Shteamer. But a note on her departure: Of all the people to be freaking out about never being able to find a man, should it really by the smokin’ hot blonde who also has a really nice personality? I’m guessing you’ll survive, Casey.

2. Scrapbooks are the worst thing that’s ever happened to paper...

... not counting the Twilight books.

Has there been a worse gift in the history of gift-giving than that pathetic scrapbook from Blakeley? (I know what you’re thinking: “Pot holders would have been worse.” No. No they wouldn’t have.) Why don’t women understand this: Guys hate arts and crafts! Stop expecting us to pretend to find them fun. We never will.

Even looking at scrapbooks that seem like they required a lot of effort makes guys want to fall asleep for about 100 years, Rip Van Winkle-style. But a scrapbook that looks like someone just cut out a bunch of country names from an old National Geographic issue? Even worse. The only thing a guy wants to be given that was cut out of a magazine is a coupon for a strip-club buffet lunch. (Don’t hate, people — the food there isn’t so bad.)

It was like Ben was an illiterate adult and Blakeley was the good Samaritan who was finally teaching him how to read. She’s like, “Sound it out — you can do this! ‘San-Fran-Cis-Co.’ There you go!”

3. Jamie reading to Ben from Kissing for Dummies was a major insult.

Frankly, I have no idea why Jamie Otis thought it would be a good idea to go on The Bachelor, seeing as how it almost appears as though she’s never been on an actual date before. Why else would she think that kissing instructions would be appreciated? Does she think that guys like asking for directions to places and reading instructions for things?

Guys are super-insulted at the slightest implication that anything they’re doing bedroom-wise — whether it’s kissing or “other stuff” — is at all less than the best that’s ever been done to you. Every guy is convinced that he is to kissing what Henry Ford was to the car, meaning that while he didn’t technically invent it, he damn near perfected it to the point that his name will forever be associated with it. So, Jamie, you should keep those suggestions to yourself for as long as humanly possible (and even that probably isn’t enough time).

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02.9.2012 / 03:01 AM EDT by Ryan Gajewski
Related: The Bachelor, Gossip, The Bachelorette

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