“I Owns That Guppy Mouth” and More Quotes From Glee Season 2, Episode 14

The newest episode of Glee did not disappoint, especially with so much drunken craziness! If we could, we'd totally give the Glee writers a hug because they were so on point. Here are our picks for the top 10 quotes from Season 2, Episode 14: “Blame It on the Alcohol.” And don’t forget to check our honorable mentions section to see if YOUR favorite quote made the list!

“I Owns That Guppy Mouth” and More Quotes From Glee Season 2, Episode 14
Credit: Adam Rose/FOX ©2011 Fox Broadcasting Co.    

10. We’d hate to hear the birds that sound like that
Santana: I’ve been dry-heaving all weekend. When my mother asked what the sound was, I said that I was practicing bird calls.

9. Rachel runs a tight ship
Rachel: Brittany, remember the rules: No sitting on anything!

8. Now we sorta want to know what was on there!
Finn: Kurt’s been blackmailing me ever since he saw my browser history.

7. Sue explains the job market
Sue: News flash, Imelda: There’s no one lining up to coach glee clubs because it’s a sucky job for losers.

6. It’s all making sense for Finn now
Rachel: It’s alcohol awareness week and we’re supposed to sing songs about the dangers of drinking, and I’ve never even had a drink.
Finn: Wait — seriously? That’s why I never got past second base.

5. Brittany gets easily offended
Quinn: There’s a fair amount of the pot calling the kettle black right now.
Brittany (to Mercedes): That is so racist.

4. In Kurt’s eyes, Blaine has hit a new low
Kurt: You spent the entire evening sucking Rachel Berry’s face. That, sir, is what we call rock-bottom.

3. It’s not a party without Four Loko
Santana (to Will): Oh, you’re one to talk. How about you crack a Four Loko, Count Boozy Von Drunk-a-Ton?

2. Artie’s done with being the messenger
Mercedes: Tell them I’ll go if they go.
Artie: Tell ‘em yourself! I ain’t no Pony Express.

1. Santana has a strange way of showing she cares
Santana: You know what? A reminder. I owns that guppy mouth. Those trouty Aerosmith lips belong to me. [Sam and Brittany kiss.] You know what this is not? Hey, honies? It’s not a Big Red commercial. No me gusta.

Honorable Mentions (Via Wetpaint’s Glee Facebook page. Not a fan? Go “Like” us already!)

Sue: Two days ago I received a drunk dial from a horny Will Schuester. (Thanks Natalie Feldman!)

Rachel to Blaine: Your face tastes awesome. (Thanks to Brooke Thomas and Erika Hamel!)

Rachel: I just had a relationship with someone who turned out to be gay. That is song writing gold! (Thanks Katrina Stephenson!)

02.24.2011 / 01:21 AM EDT by Ryan Gajewski
Related: Glee, Top 10 Lists

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