Thankfully, Snooki & JWOWW Season 1, Episode 5 plucks us up from the cliff off of which we were dangling from last week’s episode: Snooki reveals to her Jersey Shore family (minus the notably-uninvited The Situation) that she is pregnant. On a cake.
As one can imagine, Vinnie freaks a little bit (“Oh my god! It looks just like me!), doing mental math on his fingers, figuring whether or not he could be the father in one of those Maury pre-show moments of realtalk.
All ball-busting aside, the crew genuinely seem more excited for Snooki’s pending motherhood than her pending marriage and offer their quintessentially Jersey words of support:
Deena: “My meatball’s getting engaged and she’s, freakin, gettin’ pregnant over here. What the hell is going on? Right now, I feel like, the only meatball I have left is the one on my plate....It’s gonna be the most loved baby.”
Sammi: “You’re gonna be a nice, young mom and you’re gonna grow up and have, like, a nice life with your kids.”
Vinny: “Everything happens for a reason. This is your path.”
Jenni admits that Nicole’s pregnancy has made her scared of having children. One can only imagine how that notion developed after the girls Google a live birth online. Judging by the fact that their conversation immediately turned to kegels, inferring a touch of paranoia about what happens after you give birth wouldn’t be terribly bold.
With “breaking the news to the roommates” crossed off the list, the girls are ready to cross all Ts and dot all Is in their apartment’s decor and seal the deal with a housewarming party. Despite a few awkward hiccups, namely:
1) it is a barbeque and Jionni doesn’t know how to assemble a grill
2) Snooki is bored because everyone is drunk and she’s not
3) Jionni and Roger try to roundhouse kick one another to the head, and
a) fail, and
4) Roger boasts about the four times his more-than-admittedly small penis has conquered chlamydia
a) in front of Jenny’s father
Aside from all of that, the party goes well. Snooki and her papa bond in their sobriety and both of the fathers-of-the-house have a heart-to-heart. La famiglia is growing tighter for sure, and the girls are growing into formidable hostesses; both of which are fantastic news, considering “it takes a village” to properly (b)raise a meatball.
Catch the next episode of Snooki & JWOWW on Thursday, July 26 on MTV.
Read more about Snooki’s pregnancy.
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