Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries Modeled These 4 Habits of Soon-to-Be Exes
Can four actions really lead to a divorce? According to a recent study, yes. And Kim Kardashian and ex-hubby Kris Humphries showed all four, as proven by a fascinating new blog post on the Scientific American website.
After a spending 14 years examining 15-minute conversations between spouses and keeping tabs on the couples in question, psychologist John Gottman identified four behaviors that predict whether that couple will survive or split with 93% accuracy! Eerie, right? (We're not saying your relationship is in trouble if you dabble in any or all of these behaviors — we're pretty sure you have to really make these habits.)
The Scientific American then found a perfect example of a married couple that showed all four behaviors before splitting: Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. Here are, as Gottman calls it, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Contempt, according to Gottman, runs deeper than arguments or conflicts: Contempt is anger mixed with disgust. Scientific American cites the famous excerpt of Keeping Up With the Kardashians when Kris and Kim argue about the prospect of moving to Minnesota, and Kris tells Kim that "no one will probably care" about her in a few years.
Criticism in a relationship is more than complaining about a certain act, Gottman asserts: It's complaining about a partner's personality. The site uses Kim attacking Kris as "someone who brushes their teeth so hard that they make the entire mirror all [spitty]." It may seem minor, but digs like these build up and lead to contempt.
Defensiveness is something we all resort to at some point in our relationships, but constantly asserting that we are always right and casting ourselves as the victim is a problem. Kinda like that time Kris and Kim were horsing around in the ocean before Kim blames him for the loss of her earring, Scientific American says.
Stonewalling is the act of completely withdrawing from a discussion or argument, thereby grinding any sort of productive discourse to a screeching halt. The Kris-and-Kim example Scientific American cites? Well, we can't steal all of their thunder, especially because the full article is worth a read. Click over for the examples and clips, plus the researcher's recommendations for steps to recovery.