10. Jenni: "If you loved him, you wouldn't have done that with Vinny." It only counts if she remembers it, though, right?
9. Mike, screaming at Snooki: "TALK TO ME FIRST! I'M ALWAYS NICE!" Um, if you say so.
8. Vinny: "I'm seeing Sicily for the first time. It looks like Jurassic Park." Well, maybe the blood-thirsty dinosaurs are why his family emigrated in the first place.
7. Pauly: "I hope your family likes me." Vinny: "Oh, they will baby. Don't worry about it." Pauly: "You might be moving too fast for me." And this is why Pauly and Vin are our favorite Jersey Shore couple.
6. Snooki: "Cool. History. Boo! Like, you know. Like, I'm not into geography anymore. Give me f**king wine." Snooki says "yes!", but her liver says "boo!"
5. Snooki: "When people function in the morning this early, this isn't real life to me. It's like a video game." Those six mimosas probably aren't helping, dear.
4. Mike, to his friend The Unit: "Yo', remember when you were bangin' Snooki's friend Ryder?..." Why, it sounds like the beginning of a fairytale, doesn't it?
3. Deena: "The boys are going to Sicily. So we decided we're going to Tuscany on a wine tour. We're gonna drink some wine, get some drunk." Man, if Deena's English is this bad, imagine what her Italian sounds like.
2. Snooki: "I really, honestly thought we didn't have sex. Like, I blacked out a little bit. What're you gonna do?" Survey says: check into rehab.
1. Pauly: "I've roomed with Vinny before. I know what it sounds like when he gets it in. I know what goes down. And, um, they got it in." Informative. Totally weird and creepy, but informative.