8:00 — I have a confession to make: I'm kind of in love with Cher.
8:02 — Say what you want about this performance, but will you look this fabulous at 67?
8:07 — Karina is just the cutest.
8:08 — Corbin and Karina have already done the Argentine Tango, so this is going to be amazing, right?
8:08 — "It looks like the Mirror Ball melted on your head!" Love you, Tom. Mean it.
8:12 — Corbin is just kind of perfect. Carrie Ann says he brought his "A" game — but "he got caught behind his feet a bit."
8:12 — Is Tom doing Brooke's job now? I like it.
8:13 — Cher loved it, so it must be flawless.
8:14 — 9-"Cher, 9"—9 for Corbin and Karina!
8:20 — Leah was really obsessed with Sonny and Cher, wasn't she?
8:22 — This Viennese Waltz is kind of awkward, no?
8:22 — Bruno compares it to "Alice in Wonderland." We don't know what that means.
8:24 — Cher, however, liked the emotional touch of the dance, which was about Sonny and Cher's meet cute at a coffee show.
8:25 — 8-9-8 for Leah and Tony!
8:32 — So many spoilers in that two-second behind-the-scenes clip of Pretty Little Liars. So happy to see Brant back on set!
8:33 — What is Peta wearing?
8:34 — And of course Peta kissed Brant.
8:35 — Cher and Carrie Ann tell Brant he has "star quality." Um, have they not seen Pretty Little Liars? Noel Kahn is a star.
8:36 — But Carrie Ann tells Brant to work on his lines.
8:37 — 9-9-9 for Brant and Peta!
8:41 — Elizabeth is kind of like that girl at the front of the class who freaks out over everything — aka the real-life Jesse Spano.
8:43 — Do we think Val is having fun this season? Or is he kind of over it?
8:45 — This Jazz routine is definitely off-beat and weirdly intense. Also, why does she keep spinning?
8:47 — Well, at least Cher loved it.
8:47 — 8-9-8 for Elizabeth and Val!
8:57 — If we were giving out superlatives, Bill and Emma would be Class Clowns — and overall flawless human beings.
8:59 — "I was gagging of laughter," says Bruno. Go home, Bruno, you're drunk.
8:59 — "You were off the beat, but I loved it."
9:00 — "I was amazed that you could get her up in all those positions... and fly her around." Cher walked right into that one.
9:00 — 8-8-8 for Bill and Emma!
9:03 — Love that Jack's confidence is up after last week's first 10.
9:04 — This is definitely Jack's best routine to date. He looks so confident and most importantly, in control of this Tango.
9:05 — "Everything looks refined when you do it," says Carrie Ann. "You look like a pimp!" yells Cher. "That's what Tango is all about — the pimp and the hooker!" says Bruno. Yep. It just went there.
9:06 — 9-9-9 for Jack and Cheryl!
9:14 — "If you want to call out for pizza, you can do that too." "I don't know how to call out for pizza." Cher and Tom should have their own reality show. I'd watch it.
9:14 — If Cher could turn back time, she would go back to the '80s. "I just had so much fun in the '80s, I can't even tell you..."
9:15 — I really want Amber to feel sexy enough for this Rumba. She can't let all of these sailors go to waste!
9:16 — This Rumba is definitely getting a 10 from Cher.
9:17 — Bruno calls Amber a "girl on top" and now things are getting weirdly sexual again.
9:18 — Carrie Ann felt like it wasn't Amber's best dance. "I feel like you could push yourself a little bit further."
9:19 — 9-9-10 for Amber and Derek! (Also, did Amber just quote those AT&T commercials? "I want more! I want more!"
9:24 — You guys, Cher just brought the feather headdress out. Now it's a party!
9:26 — Aww, Chaz is in the audience cheering on his mom.
9:28 — I love that Val always wants to take on the "Goliah" and not the "David." He's not one for games, and it's kind of a nice change.
9:30 — It's Corbin and Karina vs. Elizabeth and Val. They'll be dancing Cha-Cha. Since both couples have had great Cha-Chas in the past, this should be a pretty good dance-off.
9:36 — Corbin and Karina clearly had the better technical Cha-Cha, but Elizabeth and Val might have had one of their best dances yet.
9:37 — It was an unanimous vote — Corbin and Karina!
8:38 — Brant and Peta choose Leah and Tony, and they'll be dancing Rumba. (Did they all conspire to keep Bill and Emma in the competition?)
9:40 — Brant clearly has more chemistry with Peta than Leah has with Tony, but Leah totally nailed that routine all on her own.
9:41 — Cher feels the emotion from all four, she says. (Why is Cher such a PC judge?)
9:42 — Carrie Ann and Cher both vote for Leah and Tony, making them the winners. Now, that's a nice Monday night surprise.
9:47 — So it's Bill and Emma vs. Jack and Cheryl for their Disco dance-off.
9:48 — Jack really surprised us with this one! Those lifts did not look easy, and he looked like he was having so much fun.
9:50 — "I thought it was funny how you just tossed her and left her!"
9:50 — The judges unanimously vote for Jack and Cheryl, but that's OK because Bill and Emma are safe this week, says Tom. Bill is by far the fan favorite in the competition, and we really want to see him go all the way. Who doesn't love a good underdog story?
9:56 — Elizabeth and Val are SAFE, followed by Corbin and Karina and Leah and Tony.
9:57 — So Jack and Cheryl and Brant and Peta are in jeopardy... who's going home?! (We think it's going to be Brant.)
9:58 — And the eliminated couple is... Brant and Peta. That's too bad. We definitely thought Brant was going to make it to the end.
What do you think of Week 8, DWTS fans? Do you think Cher was a fair judge? Sound off in the comments!
Crystal Bell is an editor at Wetpaint Entertainment and our resident fangirl for all things The Vampire Diaries. Follow her on Twitter and Google+!