Credit: Robert Ascroft/Bravo © NBC Universal, Inc. Photo: Drew Ginsburg Promo Shot Closeup

The first season of Most Eligible Dallas is drawing to a close. In honor of the show's first season, we've collected our very favorite quotes from Dallas' resident King of Snark, Drew Ginsburg.

10. "I'm not your stereotypical gay man. Gasoline runs in my veins."
That sounds unhealthy.

9. "When I screw up, I always screw up big time."
Well, at least he realizes his faults.

8. About Matt: “Damn that motherf*cker’s got beautiful eyes!”
Truth.

7. "People look at me and go, 'How the f**k are you gay — you sell cars!' I don't know, I've broken the motherf**king mold all my life."
Gay people aren't supposed to sell cars? Who knew?

6. "I'm just hoping the matchmaker can find someone that I can trust, love, and can keep up with my rabbit-like symptoms of horniness."
It's a hard task.

5. “Tonight Daylon decides to invite Tara, Courtney and I over for dinner. So basically two f*gs and their hags.”
And people were surprised this led to drama.

4. "Screw this match-making crap. I can basically do better on my own, hanging out in the park at night when it's dark."
Once again: Truth.

3. "I don't like saying stepmother, because she's two years older than me... She can't technically birth me."
This is a great standard for who is and is not an acceptable stepparent.

2. “It’d be like me going up to you like, ‘Hey Matt, um, you wanna suck a c*ck?’”
Alcoholism and liking girls: Pretty much the same thing.

1. To Courtney: “Why are you a two-faced c*nt?”
The man has an elegant way with words.

Did we miss one of your favorite Drew-isms? Sound off in the comments! And remember to tune in for the Most Eligible Dallas finale on Monday, October 17 at 10 pm ET/PT on Bravo.

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