The Week of 2/7 in Weird News Stories — and How We’d Cast Them in Hollywood!

Security agents at Tocumen International Airport in Panama noticed that a 44-year-old Guatemalan woman was acting strangely on February 4, X-rayed her, and in so doing discovered more than three dozen bundles of cash inside her stomach. Though she’s still in the process of “expelling” the money — gross — authorities estimate the partially digested prize totals over $31,000.

In the broad comedy Bellyful of Balboa, we’d go the blind-casting route, if only to recruit Melissa McCarthy, because so many of her characters are such awesomely bad liars.