Harrison is bleeding out! At least, that's the nightmare Dex wakes to in the middle of the night when he hears his son cries out and finds what looks like bloody footprints. Luckily, it's just popsicle juice, and Harrison's biggest problem is a stomach ache from eating an entire box. Dex cleans him up and gives him Pepto — in full good-daddy mode.

Meanwhile, Deb is also not feeling great: She's passed out drunk in her car. An officer finds her and arrests her for having hit a parking meter. Deb bursts out laughing before saying, "Mother s—t." (Always good for a new profanity, that Deb!) The cop, recognizing her, offers to call Dex, but she instead dials Quinn — who comes to Miami Metro and gets her out of trouble.


In the light of morning, Dex arrives at the team's latest crime scene: Lyle Sussman's cabin. Sussman, however, is not where Dex found him last — hanging on the porch — but instead face down in a bloody heap, having been shot in the head. Dex suspects someone restaged the death to get the cops off the case.

Quinn drives Deb to work and expresses concern over her drinking. She accuses him of being a big, fat hypocrite. Her boss, Elway, arrives and tells her to clean up her act for a client meeting that morning.

Meanwhile, the good doctor Vogel receives two more brain chunks at home, these ones in gift-wrapped boxes marked "His" and "Hers."

Showing them to Dex, she says they're the occipital lobe — the part of the brain responsible for vision. Dex surmises that the message is that the killer is watching both of them, even if the killer doesn't know who Dexter is. He thinks the killer shot Sussman in the head to hide the absence of the lobe.

Dex tells Vogel that he's researching her list of former patients and currently is focusing on Ron Galuzzo, a real charmer of a guy who strangled his best friend in high school and convinced Vogel that a bully had done it. The two assume that if Galuzzo read Vogel's book, he would have realized that she's the one who pushed for his institutionalization.

Quinn arrives at Sussman's cabin late (which Batista takes as a personal affront) and tells Dex about Deb's arrest. Dex tells Vogel that he told Deb everything. But Vogel is just intrigued that Dex cares so much about Deb's wellbeing.

Elway and Deb meet with a woman who wants to know if her husband is having an affair, but Deb isn't exactly toeing the company line, telling the wife that truth is overrated.

Dex arrives at the office and expresses his due brotherly concern for Deb. He proposes dinner; she only agrees when he promises to leave her alone.

Back at Miami Metro, Batista announces that they're closing the Brain Surgeon case, since they have no idea that Sussman isn't the Surgeon. They move on to El Sapo. Dex, sure they'll never figure out Deb killed El Sapo, decides to focus on helping Vogel.

After the meeting, Batista talks to Deputy Chief Matthews about promoting Quinn to sergeant; but Matthews throws some serious shade Quinn's way.

Deb and Elway catch the cheating husband in the act, snapping photos while they talk about their personal lives. He talks to Deb about Quinn, whom he assumes is Deb's booty call. He's not judgmental, so she opens up about her private life. It's actually cute banter! (They later show their damning photos to the wife, who refuses to accept that the man is clearly her husband. Elway tells Deb that some people just prefer to live in denial.)

Deb stalks Galuzzo at his mall kiosk and feigns interest in Galuzzo's products while making small talk about Vogel's book, but Galuzzo lies about not knowing her. Later, Dex tells Vogel that he will snoop around the guy's house.

Vogel says that Dex's daddy, Harry, insisted that the first rule of the Code be Dex only killing bad people — and that Vogel proposed making the first rule about Dex not getting caught to give him a little wiggle room. She wonders why he didn't kill Deb when she discovered his secret, then questions his love for Deb, implying that it's selfish.

"I want you to revel in what you are," she says. "You're perfect as a psychopath. All this talk about helping Debra and loving her is like you're MIchelangelo trying to play the banjo."

Meanwhile, Batista loses patience as he tutors Quinn on the sergeant's test — before accidentally reveals to Jamie that Quinn wasn't responding to a case when he slipped out the previous night. Jamie is mad that once again Quinn is prioritizing Deb.

Deb reluctantly meets Dex for dinner at a tacky restaurant and is miserable until Dex reveals the reason they're there: A man Deb saved is eating in the same restaurant with his adorable family. "You're a good person," he assures her. "You brought a lot of good to the world."

She seems genuinely touched and relaxes a little. "I'm f—king starving," she announces. They both laugh together for the first time in forever.

The next day, Dex breaks into Galuzzo's house, finding a finger in the stew the guy has in the crock pot. He realizes Galuzzo's kitchen is a kill room. He finds plastic containers filled with body parts in the fridge and freezer. (Quoth Rachael Ray, "Yummo!")

Deb, meanwhile, is drinking in her car outside Miami Metro, watching and re-watching the footage of herself saving the guy from the restaurant. She stumbles up to Homicide, and Quinn finds her. She says she wants to make an official statement, telling him, "I killed LaGuerta."

He's sure he didn't hear that correctly, so she starts to say it louder, but Quinn covers her mouth and takes her to the interrogation room for privacy.

Quinn figures Deb feels guilty that she didn't do more to save LaGuerta, but she pleads for him to believe that she was actually the killer. He has her start drafting a  statement.

Quinn calls Dex with the news, and Dex speeds to Miami Metro with Vogel in tow. The doc thinks that Deb maybe would be best helped in prison, telling Dex, "You're mostly worried about yourself." Dex objects, saying that he loves Deb; but Vogel says that he doesn't love her the same way.

"When Debra killed LaGuerta, it was real, selfless love. She sacrificed everything she believed in for you," she says.

At the station, Vogel throws psychobabble Quinn's way. She and Dex enter the interrogation room. Seeing her, Deb combusts. Dex simply syringes her, and she passes out.

"That was interesting," says Vogel.

The doc hides the syringe and the statement as Quinn comes back in. They tell him that Deb passed out from her drinking and that she needs rest, so Quinn has them carry her out the back door. They take Deb to her house and lie her down on the couch.

"I thought I could fix this, but you're right. I can't," Dex confesses. "I don't want to keep making her worse."

He handcuffs Deb to her couch to keep Vogel safe as she babysits Deb.

"Vogel was right. I am perfect," Dex narrates. "But only at one thing."

Cut to: Galuzzi's kitchen, where Dex has him bound to the table, naked.

"Now I realize I'm just like you," he hisses at Galuzzi. "I consume everyone I love."

He plunges a knife into Galuzzi's chest, and we end the episode on another positively cheerful note.

See you next week!

Dan Clarendon is an assistant editor at Wetpaint Entertainment. Follow him on Twitter and Google+!